Devin Apple

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

I feel personally attacked.

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

Wanna feel old? Watch this https://t.co/DVoPCptgzG

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

Can we talk about how unfair it is that I have buy new clothes for summer every year bc I get fatter n fatter but I can still fit into the same xSmall chunky sweater I’ve been wearing for the past 6 christmases... Christmas’s? Lol 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

I want abs, but not more than I want chips and queso with an ice cold margarita. 😘 #Priorities

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

Quit.

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

Can I just be Rachael Ray already? 🙄

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

I hate when people ask me what my type is like truly none of the guys i’ve dated have anything in common except that they don’t like me

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

This question is specific to people to who listen to asmr.. do you have dreams about killing people violently or do you just dream about strangers whispering softly yet rapidly into your ear? 🤔🧐

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

So funny how I used to sit in front a computer screen and play the Sims for 13 hours straight but now all of a sudden I just HAVE to have blue light glasses to save my life.

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

I propose that to replace handshakes we all start doing finger guns at each other when we first meet and whoever gets theirs up first wins

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

So I know I turned 26 today but I’m pretty sure I actually turned 65 bc my MOTHER just told me what “goat” means... 🐐 wtf 🤦🏻‍♀️

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

I think that summer when “shut up and dance” was popular was the last time I was able to produce my own serotonin

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

The only time I’ve ever used initials after a first name is if there’s someone else with the same name, this is not the case in this show. It’s just John B. Who chose that???

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

I liked outer banks but no one in the history of the world has ever called their friend by their first name and middle initial, constantly, 5000 times per sentence

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

I hate weekends now. Give me Monday so I have something to do! #QuarantineLife

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

@lilylyray Throw me back in the trash can they crawled out of. 👏🏻

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

Unpopular opinion: Brokeback Mountain was released before the world was ready for it. If it would’ve been released now? Huge hit. Romantic love story! But bc it came out when it did... too soon?? But it got ppl talking.. idk? What do u think?

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

@chelseachilis ❤️❤️❤️❤️ so happy for you. Seriously. I don’t know you that well but that’s fucking awesome and you deserve it.

[Devin Apple @devinleeapple94]

I may be 7 white claws in but MEN R DICKS. And yes, they have dicks, and they’re great. But when they act like I dick??? Why? What on earth would provoke a man to treat a woman who is giving him errrrrthing he wants, to treat her like a small, stupid, dumb ass dick? Tell me. 👏🏻