🖤devon🖤

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@eveporcello EVE! you’re so great. thanks for remembering me, maybe you brought me back from the dead

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

sorry i’ve been afk for a few years, i was in a coma.
jk my life was falling apart and i lost access to my account.

anyway? how you been?

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

Im not gonna cry today.

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

Yesterday someone knocked on my office door and I answered “cowabunga” and I have no idea what’s going on anymore

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@sanguish All looks 🙁

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

False pockets on a dress are an offense by the patriarchy.
I am the victim of a crime

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@hobiehenning @swifteves Yep

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

Just in case you’re looking, my org at Apple is hiring SREs, engineering managers, infrastructure managers, a system’s reliability tech lead, a cloud SRE manager, build engineers and much more. These aren’t full time remote roles, but im happy to provide more info in dms

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

sorry i disappeared from twitter for a while, i was busy working really hard, sweating a lot, crying a little and getting promoted 🖤
i hope you had a great summer 🫶🏼

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@slightlygilded @CanyonRanch

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

Im spending next week at a retreat in the desert so I did my nails last weekend to go with the theme & coincidentally these 🔥 shoes arrived in the mail last night which also match

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@jimmylittle touché

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

What if instead of turtles, it was just mediocre white men thinking they know more than they do all the way down

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@normanmaurer What a jerk!

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

me: I can't believe these people are squatting on a whole /32
coworker: devon, thats a single ipv4
me: exactly. like what year is it.

[(((Nicole Aimée Schreiber))) @nicoleaimee]

Me: Did you feel so powerful shooting a gun?

@devonbl: Not at all. But I once told an over paid man he was under performing and that was *chefs kiss*

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@jjirsa @bastafidli Where are you Jeff.

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

I know a lot of people more willing to permanently share their location than send read receipts and honestly I agree.

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

How do you say “no you’re wrong and what you’re spewing is totally lies” but like professionally?

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

@zznate yes

[🖤devon🖤 @devonbl]

for my former self*, let’s push all the junk to production that we’ve been sitting on the last week and see if we can cause some mayhem

*my former punk rock teen self would call me a sell out, key my car and steal my shoes