4th Sanderson Sister

writer, dreamer, gamer, aspiring full-stack developer, intersectional feminist, favorite aunt 💋

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

I have officially repressed the memory of high school. It’s a Christmas miracle 🎄 #joytotheworld

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@GabbySidibe Damnit Aaron, pull your freakin’ weight dude 😹

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@sara_snel I’ve been trying to figure out what color to do next time I can coerce my cousin into doing my hair - maybe purple is the one!

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@GabbySidibe 😂 The parentheses tho 😂 ‘cause you know the headline would be “Empire star threatens overdose due to failed high school romance”. Seriously tho, it’s nice that I’m not the only one whose brain doesn’t understand bedtime

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@sara_snel I’d be down with a movie. Maybe Michael organizes a reunion cruise - “The Office at Sea”!

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

Overheard at TJ Maxx:

Little girl: Does this one have pockets?
Mom: No.
LG: Does THIS one have pockets?
Mom: No.
LG: *Growls like a wild animal*

I feel your frustration, little one.

#pocketprobs

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

Got #horses? Worried about smoke inhalation? Here are the resources from veterinarians you need: https://t.co/TduPT8rKUI…, https://t.co/xhbxl5KbuU…, https://t.co/Yn7rBm8hyj… #woolseyfire #socalfire #socalfires #firesafety #horseinfo

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

If you have horses to evacuate and no horse trailer, call your local officials! Most counties have trailers on call and will send someone. #WoolsleyFire #HorseInfo #SoCalFires

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

My mom: I don’t know whose keys these are.

Also my mom: *adds her keys to random anonymous keys and walks around with them*

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@ThatCrazyMJ In the Expanse series every high-ranking person is referred to as sir by their subordinates. Maybe these folks just recognize that you are a queen and they can’t even get on your level 👑

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

Halloween costume idea: Buy a Toad costume, paint it orange, go as Trump’s dick. You’re welcome. #halloween #halloweird #halloweencostume #toad #mariokart

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@sara_snel Candy corn = corn = a veggie, you’re golden!

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

If you’re voting by mail, this is your friendly reminder that you need to use TWO (2) stamps, even though the envelope only shows space for one. #GetOutAndVote #vote #votebymail #psa #elections

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

You can’t be “worried for your sons” and not care that they’re part of a society that teaches there are no consequences for sexual assault. You aren’t worried your son will be accused of something he didn’t do. You’re worried he’ll have to face consequences for something he did.

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@sara_snel If you come to So Cal, hit me up! 🌴

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

Me: Do you know which one’s the gas and which one’s the brake?

My 11-yo niece: Umm.... kinda?

Me: Cool, cool, you’ll do great.

(Also me: This driving lesson was a terrible idea and we are going to die.)

#drivinglessons #proudaunt #butdidyoudietho

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

@mymonsterischic Not gonna lie, I was kinda hoping this follow-up tweet would be a close-up of Cardboard Cage’s chest region with you peering around the side like 🖕 you pervs

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

Me: One pumpkin spice latte, please.

Barista in Southern California where it’s currently 90 degrees: Iced, right?

Me: Um... no. 🙈

#basic #psl #classic #pumpkinspiceeverything #californiaproblems

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

FOR FUCK’S SAKE @DonaldJTrumpJr leave @kathygriffin the fuck alone and focus on making America great again. We’ve got kids being shot in their classrooms, black men being gunned down in their apartments, homelessness, rape, murder - FOR GOD’S SAKE PICK ONE AND FUCKING FOCUS 🎤🖐

[4th Sanderson Sister @devopsdreamgirl]

Health concern trolls: I don’t hate you bc you’re fat, I hate you bc you’re ~unhealthy~
Me: So.... the products you’re promoting are “health restoration” tea and “miracle cure” lollipops?
HCTs: Uhhhhh fat ppl should just lose weight

Yeah, okay 👌 #overit #justloveyourdamnself