DianaC

AMC 💎GME 🥂

[Dfw_camo @dontplay_z]

Why is it that actual human jobs like baker, florist, teacher, and childcare worker barely pay a livable wage, while fake jobs like Al specialist bootlicker, marketing campaign parasite, and synergy consultant are pulling six figures?

[DianaC @didi_mc_]

@pradooshah 😳after 6 months I declare them dead. Either that or you wanted some drama in your life 😂

[Shekhar Dutt @DuttShekhar]

wakes me up every time

[IT Unprofessional @it_unprofession]

I haven't paid for a personal vacation in 8 years.

Every summer, I review our annual software licensing contracts to see who is up for renewal soon.

I look for the vendors who are most desperate to maintain our enterprise tier subscription.

Yesterday, I had a Zoom call with our primary cloud security provider.

They charge us $400K a year for a threat detection dashboard that literally no one in the company has ever logged into.

I told their account executive that we were strongly considering migrating to a competitor due to strategic alignment issues.

He immediately went pale and asked what he could do to retain our business.

I told him I needed to conduct a rigorous, in-person audit of their latest technology.

I casually mentioned that their upcoming developer conference in Honolulu seemed like the perfect venue for this deep dive.

He caught the hint instantly.

By the end of the day, he had expensed a first-class round-trip ticket and a 7-night stay at a luxury resort in Maui.

He also included a $2K per diem for networking dinners.

My wife thinks I'm an important executive who is constantly requested at high-level industry summits.

She has no idea that I spend these trips drinking expensive cocktails by the pool while my automated scripts delete spam emails back in Chicago.

The vendor knows I'm never going to actually audit their software platform.

I know their software is completely useless.

But we're both trapped in a beautiful corporate dance of mutual extortion.

He gets to keep his massive commission check, and I get an all-expenses-paid trip to Hawaii.

When I return, I'll send our CFO a 2-page PDF summary to justify the time away.

The tech industry is just a massive luxury travel agency disguised as a meritocracy.

[Johnny Midnight ⚡️ @its_The_Dr]

Yes.

[ً @artfuIchaos]

can’t believe it’s already August. time flies when you live life on survival mode and work everyday of your fucking life.

[Uzi @UziCryptoo]

Your raise: +2%, +2.5%, +3%, +2%

Your rent: +8%, +11%, +9%, +14%

Your grocery bill: +6%, +9%, +12%, +11%

Your energy bill: +12%, +15%, +9%, +27%

Your savings: 0%, 0%, 0%, 0%

But sure, the 3% year was a “strong performance review.”

[Just a Dude Who Invests @DudeWhoInvests]

Mortgage rates are about to be 7%. You would have to be mentally ill to buy a house with that high of an interest rate.

The entire housing market is about to crumble, then fully COLLAPSE.

[End Wokeness @EndWokeness]

Men fleeing war bring their families.

Men going to war leave them behind.

[DianaC @didi_mc_]

@Tinawa39572 Hi Amanda 👁️👄👁️

🤣😆He just saved the gene pool

[DianaC @didi_mc_]

@qoyyrazalq It’s really not that deep

[Up Workout @Upworkout]

1% motivation, 99% consistency.