dracula’s left fang

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

my gf when my childhood dog
she’s away on after running
a business trip into the road

🤝

getting her guts rearranged

[ry @rydaflyest]

I love all the parts of Late Night TV shows (guests, games, skits, music, etc.) but I think they’re way too long...so I made an entire episode of Late Night and squeezed it into under 2 1/2 minutes. Don’t worry though, what it lacks in length..it also lacks in quality!

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

An A blowjob in an
Octopus empty gun store

🤝

Just head and arms

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

My fav is choco-nut-n-butt-erscotch

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Fellas, is it gay to eat ice cream??

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Fellas, is it gay to eat ice cream??

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Construction dudes be like “sorry man, I can’t go out, my rent is due next week”

Rent??.... Bro just build a house

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Not to get British on everyone, but can we talk about Meghan and Harry’s son, Archie??

No more gardeners, maids, or personal chefs...

Dude went from being 7th in line to the King, to being 7th in line at Burger King...

He’ll take a Whopper Jr. and a job application

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

You’re telling me a huckle buried this fin???

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

I’m Squidward.

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

We boolin’?

Wii bowling?

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Okay it’s Childish Gambino, homegirl drop it....like all my responsibilities 🤪

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

The blue toad from Mario is, was, and will forever be a dirty racist. If you play as them, I have no choice, but to assume you agree with their disgusting ideology.

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Betty White
Chris Brown
Barney Purple
I Blew
Your Dad on Thanksgiving

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

ME: If ur a fan of the same sports teams that I’m a fan of, I automatically love u & assume ur a great person. U could pass me on the street, covered in blood, but wearing a Mets hat & I’d be like “ahh go Metsies”-

MY GF: Is this really ur excuse for sleeping w my friend??

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Construction dudes be like “sorry man, I can’t go out, my rent is due next week”

Rent??.... Bro just build a house

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

Elephant man? More like L(ikely) F(ake), N(erd) man

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

My dream job is to be the guy who makes the Spotify playlists for banks

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

My biggest pet peeve is seeing someone smiling to themselves... why are you so happy????

[dracula’s left fang @dininghalldj]

NEWS: Another person in the U.S. has been diagnosed with the coronavirus-

ME: Coronavirus? Is that when you can’t stop drinking CORONAS!!!! #partytime

GARY: That’s alcoholism.

NEWS: -this brings the total death count up to 18-

ME: 18? Like an 18-pack of Coronas?? #uptop