Jordan

[Jordan @dippindots420]

sometimes you wake up to your eyelid inexplicably being swollen shut, and sometimes you don’t

[Jordan @dippindots420]

i wish pete davidson by ariana grande wasn’t called that

[Jordan @dippindots420]

in the mood to change everything about my life

[Jordan @dippindots420]

found a white lighter in my drawer and got scared for a second but then remembered i’m 33 years old

[The Lesbian Pervert @babyknifespice]

asking a toddler to switch seats with me on the plane so I can sit next to their hot mom

[madiiiii ⋆.˚⟡ ࣪ ˖ @madsdanae]

I’m like if a hopeless romantic was traumatized but also a pervert

[Jordan @dippindots420]

you get ready for bed early one time and your upstairs neighbour decides to flood your apartment

[Jordan @dippindots420]

a run!!! like imagine pissing me off that badly

[Jordan @dippindots420]

so filled with rage that i, Jordan Dippindots420, used my own free will to go for a run last night

[roxy demento @falseroxy]

thinking about this post a lot today because... who the fuck is jelly roll

[Jordan @dippindots420]

there should be some kind of medal of honour earned based on number of italian days worked

[no earthquake (undignified) @no_earthquake]

girl with a stepping in the same river fetish:

[Jordan @dippindots420]

*signing up for another stupid game* sure hope it’s not a stupid prize!!

[Marlboro Apologist @CyclicalYearner]

Horror game where your only source of light is when you hit your vape

[Zohran Kwame Mamdani @ZohranKMamdani]

we both up now

[Jordan @dippindots420]

received this message from a man i’ve never met while sitting beside my mom and read it aloud to her. happy mother’s day 🩷

[໊ @wynavira]

i always am about to go to sleep at a beautiful 11pm and then something happens to me

[Sam Evans @SamEvansArt444]

Is this all there is?