Lady Di

disappointing parents everywhere since '97 *your mom’s weird friend*

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

It's such a small window of time that it's acceptable to make bad decisions

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Made a dinner so good I texted my parents about it

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Dave Chapelle did a bit in one of his specials where he talks about how people don’t care as much about tragedies in the news because in the age of the internet society is desensitized to tragedies and I think about that a lot

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

The amount of times that the iPhone autocorrects my spelling to something incorrect after I had it right to begin with is SHOCKING

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Nothing hits a like a perfectly worn in t shirt

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Thin cut pork roll > thick cut pork roll

[bug girl @buggirl]

i miss how delusional i was from age 17-20💔 bring her back

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Fuck this shit and fuck all the gym teachers who didn’t believe me when I said I’ve never been able to touch my toes. GOODNIGHT.

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

Ok but why did we all have to do this to impress George W Bush? Like why did he care?

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

When oh shit turns into congrats😅

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Unless your name is Emma and you’re carrying my nephew, please stop getting pregnant….I ain’t ready to be this old

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Every now and then I think of the group of acrobats I befriended in San Francisco, I hope they’re well

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

I wish I could stop thinking about work while I’m at home :/

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Someone teach me how to eat breakfast before work without getting violently nauseous

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

@eminemaaa3 Aba humor

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Sorry to Emma who has to deal w me fired up about my preferred and non preferred Kardashians before 8 am

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Having a cat is just having something judge you every step of the way through your morning routine

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

@eminemaaa3 My nips ain’t even looking in the same direction 🤷‍♀️

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

I NEED TO KNOW WHO HAS SEEN IT FALL

[emi 💗🦄⭐️ @eminemaaa3]

ovulation boobs should be forever

[Lady Di @disappointingdi]

Damnnnnnnnn

[Phish: From The Road @Phish_FTR]

I Am the Walrus