if i invite you to garden on the first date that is my subliminal messaging that i wanna fuck u dolphin style in the shower don’t fumble that bc ur scared of a lil bug up ur ass
fun fact of the day is when i was researching 70s lube alternatives for a fic I came across a reddit thread from someone who tried this and DEEPLY regretted it
hung up new curtains with curtain rings for the first time and every 10 minutes my dog comes into the room to move them around/hide under them so he can hear the rings