Dom

Rocky's mom ❣

[maddie, hot dog enthusiast @damnitmadeline]

Today I was briefly supervising my friend’s class & a 5,000,000 gallon jug of hand sanitizer overbalanced & spilled all over the floor & the children said “what do we do?!” & I said “I don’t know I really wish I wasn’t the adult in here for this” & they all nodded understandingly

[$𝔩𝔞𝔭☃️ @slvppy]

“nobody loves you”

my dog when i get home:

[PYPER🍒 @pyperxox]

“are you awake?”
me: yeah

me after hitting send:

[kira 👾 @kirawontmiss]

LMFAOOOO

[T @Tusshavin]

My step brother came out as gay recently (i love bro) but do yall know how many cousins and friends from the neighborhood i had to fight growin up for calling him gay??? 😑 lmao

[emily may @emilykmay]

single ladies: the trampoline park on a rainy sunday afternoon is 95% divorced dads.

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

A young elephant hears his name and decides to interrupt an interview

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

sorry I can’t make it today. it’s 60 degrees & raining when it should be 30 degrees & snowing and I’m consumed by existential dread

[PYPER🍒 @pyperxox]

getting a man to do something I’m perfectly capable of doing.

[Grey @sadbokkie]

currently spiralling thinking about how no woman has ever had her own last name

[Mr. Gray @GaryLGray]

Are the guys rapping about building houses and paying bills or did I miss something

[kira 👾 @kirawontmiss]

this is the type of shit i always think about like damn people actually exist

[˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱‧₊˚ @bendergirlfrend]

I would love to drink a beer with him

[☔ @Whotfismick]

“thank god it’s the weekend”

me saturday and sunday :

[s @bambinasalina]

I be asking old people at my job so many random questions like I asked one if he ever saw Michael Jackson in concert and tell me why he put his coffee down to start talking that man said he saw him THREE times I was like wow these people exist fr

[Queen LaDeefa @It_Aint__ME]

I wanna have an open, honest conversation about PETS having attitudes.

Ppl without pets think we be lying about these pets having attitude problems. My cat really will roll her eyes and yell at me when she's mad. Like... They really be on some bs