Captain CrapAss

The matrix was a documentary

[FOX Sports: NFL @NFLonFOX]

That's it. That's the whole list.

[Mike Payton @AtoZ_Payton]

Jared Goff is the first quarterback in NFL history to have a 100% completion percentage in a game

[Detroit Lions @Lions]

Straight Aura +1000

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

Too many young white males try to look like jack Harlow.

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

I just T bagged my girlfriend. No we were not playing halo 🤭😏

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

I need to find the Rachad Wildgoose community. @Lions

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@Lions @LionsSBsoon Please sign Rachad Wildgoose to the 53 man roster. I don’t care how he did in training camp. I think the advantage you’d gain from having someone named Rachad Wildgoose on your team warrants letting him ride the bench.

[Matt Hartwell @matthartwell_]

Happy birthday, Hutch 🥳

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

Me after the lions win a preseason game

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@hubermanlab @megansadiee

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

Dragon house has done a marvelous job of putting me to sleep on Sunday nights. The finale will probably be an action packed banger. But why are we getting 1 hour of watchable TV every 4 weeks? 🥱

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@megansadiee I know you 🦦🧠🧐

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@FitFounder @megansadiee 🤔

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@megansadiee 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@megansadiee Had an idea where we brake a Guinness World Record by watching Dont Mess With the Zohan 300 times in one year.

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

That was the best episode of dragon house to date. I felt like I was watching game of thrones again.

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

@lexfridman Same lex

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

I need help deciding what streaming service I should subscribe to. I am only picking one and it needs to have Don’t mess with the Zohan.

[Captain CrapAss @DooleyNoTedd]

“You don’t have what it takes for cosplay sex. You’re too much a football and scratching your balls kinda guy”