Ivan the Red

Born at a very early age, and grew up way too fast.

[Ax D WhiteMan @Ax_D_WhiteMan]

@MattWalshBlog Yep, or graphically....

[Matt Walsh @MattWalshBlog]

1) The US already collects FIVE TRILLION DOLLARS OF TAX REVENUE A YEAR. The idea that you need to collect even more taxes — when you parasites already confiscate the equivalent of Elon’s entire net worth five times over, every year — is lunacy. Stop wasting billions of dollars a month of stupid bullshit. How about that for an idea?

2) We do not need more children in taxpayer funded daycare centers. Our goal should be precisely the opposite of that. We need more women at home raising their kids.

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

@chichimochida Wow, you are absolutely stunning!

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one Ive never tried before.

#MaeWest #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

My Grandmother is over eighty and still doesnt need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.

#HennyYoungman #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

He who is of calm and happy nature will hardly feel the pressure of age, but to him who is of an opposite disposition youth and age are equally a burden.

#Plato #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, hes the only one in the world who treats me like Im The Beatles.

#BillMaher #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

I can sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating.

#MikeTyson #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

I feel sorry for short people, you know. When it rains, theyre the last to know.

#RodneyDangerfield #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

The greatest penalty of evildoing - namely, to grow into the likeness of bad men.

#Plato #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

No man ever listened himself out of a job.

#CalvinCoolidge #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

#BenjaminFranklin #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

I dont want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

#WoodyAllen #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.

#FranLebowitz #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

Youre never too old to become younger.

#MaeWest #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

If I could drop dead right now, Id be the happiest man alive.

#SamuelGoldwyn #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

The problem is not that we have too many fools, its that the lightning isnt distributed right.

#MarkTwain #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

There is only one good, knowledge, and one evil, ignorance.

#Socrates #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.

#DouglasAdams #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD

[Ivan the Red @dorkbunkle]

It is only when men begin to worship that they begin to grow.

#CalvinCoolidge #QuoteOfTheDay #QOTD