Jared

[Jared @douchingtop]

There is no trade in the upper east side. I can’t host and I can’t travel

[Jared @douchingtop]

Are twinks born crazy or did society do this to them?

[Jared @douchingtop]

I didn’t know butt sweat was illegal

[Jared @douchingtop]

Sweated so bad out of my butt during lunch in the park that my coworker laughed at me for over 30 minutes

[Jared @douchingtop]

Is it still called hangxiety if I’m just freaking out about the insane things I said while dead sober during lunch with my coworkers a few hours ago?

[cole @juul_survivor]

Guy that I slept with liked the picture of the salad I put on my story but not the picture of myself

[Jared @douchingtop]

I will not let hantavirus perpetuate mouse hate

[Jared @douchingtop]

Posting pictures from basement on instants bc I know the staff won’t know how to delete them

[Jared @douchingtop]

I’m gay

[Jared @douchingtop]

My take on instants:

[Jared @douchingtop]

Heard two nurses in the elevator comparing peptide stacks to look young and hot forever

[Jared @douchingtop]

Everyone keeps sending me lesbian reels that I’ve already liked and shared

[Jared @douchingtop]

Oomf trade says what

[Jared @douchingtop]

No more thirst traps until my acupuncturist stops saying my body is bad

[Victoria Rose @woahhvickyyy]

Im a bastards child

[Jared @douchingtop]

I’m wearing the tightest shirt at the gym rn I feel like such a slut

[Jared @douchingtop]

Growing up is going from tamagotchis to trade

[Jared @douchingtop]

What if we all went to the upper east side for work afters

[Jared @douchingtop]

Upper east side trade exists I just know it

[Ryan @SadPaleTwink]

Using sniffies just to find public bathrooms in New York City