#AussieGirls

A troubling tale of bogans, b*tches and some questionable grooming habits.

The following is based on a true story...

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Big first time? She'll lay there like a #starfish. #aussiegirls

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Says she's deleted your number and never wants to talk again... Texts you the next weekend for a booty call #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

First date? Screen shot of STI test... Standard. #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

When "triple digits" is the only possible answer to "how many guys before me?" #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Music festival this weekend? Time to take ecstasy, dress like a slut and bang a random in the porta-loo. #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

First date: "I Skype with my ex bf in Europe every week and have his initials tattooed on my stomach." Aaaaand last date. #aussiegirls

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Start of the night: she's a 10
End of the night: she's carrying her heels and peeing in the back of a taxi.
#aussiegirls #shitaussiegirls do

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

She spent the night on a weeknight? No shower needed! She's wearing all the same clothes to work anyway. #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Going thru emotional end of long, tumultuous personality-defining relationship... Tells 1st guy she sees she has "magic pussy." #aussiegirls

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Dates a guy for 6 months... Get his name tattooed on her thigh. #classy #AussieGirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

She says "I'm trying to calm down a bit... I did a loooot of scandalous stuff in my 20s."

...She's 21.

#AussieGirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

"You don't need a condom, I'm not a slut!"

...Chlamydia.

#AussieGirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Her ex a shitc*nt dude that used to cheat on her constantly? She'll love him forever. #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Gets pregnant, doesn't know which one of the 5 guys she banged at the same party is the father. #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo #stayclassy

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Bangs on first date, sends homemade porn vids that prob weren't made for you.

"Why won't you date meeee??"

#Aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Forget the girl's name? Don't worry, it's tattooed right above her crotch... Along with some guy's name. #AussieGirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Has a big date night & knows she'll get laid... Box looks like Chewbacca eating an Ewok. #AussieGirls #shitaussiegirlsdo

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Epitome much? #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo #keitha http://t.co/hP9vjVST0Y

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

Flight of the conchords got it right #aussiegirls #shitaussiegirlsdo #keitha http://t.co/hqHdBeRBhM

[#AussieGirls @downundablunda]

buy a girl a wine... have sex in the pub's disabled toilet. Standard. #AussieGirls #shitaussiegirlsdo