dpk

My jokes are sometime funny!!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@RaminNasibov Me: Life sucks!
Also me: Let me go out looking for something to emotionally destroy me!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@thevirdas but proof of which one out of the two?

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

"Perfect husband" - Myth or Real?
#mythbusters #marriage

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

"Perfect husband" - Myth or Real?
#mythbusters #marriage

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

I wonder if my phone misses me like I miss it when we are not together. Like it be sitting on the table checking his clock every minute, just waiting to be picked up.
I am totally not projecting my abandonment issues on it, believe me!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

I wonder if my phone misses me like I miss it when we are not together. Like it be sitting on the table checking his clock every minute, just waiting to be picked up.
I am totally not projecting my abandonment issues on it, believe me!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

I don't know how we are doing too much and not enough at the same time? How did we pull this off as a species?

#anxiety #impostorsyndrome #jokes #comedy #MentalWellness

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

I don't know how we are doing too much and not enough at the same time? How did we pull this off as a species?

#anxiety #impostorsyndrome #jokes #comedy #MentalWellness

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

Is it just me or do you guys also miss anxiety on the days it doesn't show up?
#anxiety #newwayoflife #MentalWellness #jokes #comedy

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

Marriage is a weird pyramid scheme. You get married & next day, you're supposed to recruit 2 new non-suspecting singles into the business.
PSA: It may or may not be based on personal experience.
#marriage #comedy #pyramidscheme #jokes #selfwritten #singles

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

Is it just me or do you guys also miss anxiety on the days it doesn't show up?
#anxiety #newwayoflife #MentalWellness #jokes #comedy

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

Marriage is a weird pyramid scheme. You get married & next day, you're supposed to recruit 2 new non-suspecting singles into the business.
PSA: It may or may not be based on personal experience.
#marriage #comedy #pyramidscheme #jokes #selfwritten #singles

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@Fact I'm not depressed, you are!!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@cowincrisis People could say the same thing about ass!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@cowincrisis People could say the same thing about ass!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@VitaeArcanum how about a sandwich instead?

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@SunflowerGpsy @MadHatterMommy but sometimes you read a chapter of a book and you're like what in God's name is this shit? (That book was Twilight for me)

[krista @kristabellerina]

Adulting is paying bills when all you want to do is take a nap.

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@kristabellerina @MadHatterMommy Adulting is when no amount of sleep ever feels enough!

[dpk @dpakdoescomedy]

@Dadsaysjokes @MadHatterMommy Eating food someone else cooks for me!