Bing bang bong

She/her. BLM always.
A place for me to bitch about SW 🤡

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Hi @virginmedia I need to speak to a real human, not your automated phone line. How can I do this? It's urgent

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

@emilynolan01 Oh God, I actually despise that sort of encounter so much. I hate going to Bury in general, but it's made so much worse by the fear of seeing people I once knew 😭😅

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Um @UberUKsupport how do I get hold of a driver to ask them to return a lost item?! Your app is useless and not allowing me to contact my driver

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Shout out to the person in my local supermarket who always disables the weight for me on self service. £3.45 for £20's worth of shopping. They are single handedly saving the cozzie livs crisis

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

@_A_Sanch My son used to say "Mummy, can I wear your skin?" and "Can I take your head off please?"
So that was fun

[cats being weird little guys 👅 @weirdlilguys]

EGG THIEF

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

This question can also be applied to beanies, caps and a strong, swift walk

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

The age old question of "is she a lesbian or is she just wearing boots?"

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

@SophieASlut Sophie I love you so much!! Will you ever go on any podcast again do ya think?

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Dropping into my weird echo chamber to say IT'S A GOOD DAY TO BE GAY

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

@That1teddygirl Abso fucking lutely not. The idea of my son (he's 5,but still) being alone on an airplane, regardless of the fact they have flight attendents (strangers) to keep an eye on him, is terrifying. I'm not sure there's many parents who'd be OK with that

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Imagine turning 19 and receiving 19 gifts from your boyfriend to celebrate. Sounds really cute, and I did think it was really cute at the time. Now I'm almost 27 and realising how fucked up it was that a 38 year old man had anything to do with me in that way 🤮

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

well it’s over

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Two things I've learned about the middle-class (bordering on very posh) people I clean for are:
1) Only 9 put of 10 will offer you a cup of tea
2) They almost always have a huge fruit bowl overflowing with rotting fruit

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

@dhlexpressuk It's 1974980545

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

@dhlexpressuk how do I speak to someone about tracking?? My girlfriend has been expecting a package back from you for over a month now and we can't find a way to speak to anyone directly

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Very attractive older masc lesbian working at a pub I was at yesterday was flirting with me hard and gave me a free drink. I have never felt so confident in my sexuality!!!

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Plus you get the added bonus of not having to deal with men and instead get to look at ✨women✨ and that in itself is fantastic

[Bing bang bong @draculasho]

Before I met my gf, I had changed all my dating app preferences to exclude cis men and it made a world of difference to my experience. Yes, there is defo still "fuck boys" amongst queer women and people, but next to no creepiness or inappropriate behaviour.