Sylvia

Software developer, aspiring crazy cat lady, beer lover. Opinions, especially the bad ones, are my own.

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

@HappyMotorhead I don't understand the love for the 66. It's all pointy and weird, like it's trying to make a duck face in a mirror.
Team 58

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

@GrailArchive Why does it look like a Dodge charger?

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

I'm sure this has already been said, but it's so true

Development is fun again

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

This is so cool!

[Massimo @Rainmaker1973]

Using spider silk and plant fibers, the common tailorbird can stitch leaves together to create a deep, cup-shaped nest that is lined with soft materials.
https://t.co/aJDlheAjFE

[Angie Jones @techgirl1908]

I have built one of the strongest DevRel teams in the game! We are often praised by other companies for how we're educating the software engineering industry as they are incorporating AI into their workflows.

My team is at the bleeding edge of agentic engineering. They have been on the front line learning, building, and teaching AI.

Unfortunately, with the latest Block RIF, the majority of them are on the market. If you're looking for a Developer Relations Engineer, Technical Community Manager, or Tech Writer who is well versed in AI and creating impactful content, I have an entire roster available.

Please reach out to me for your next hire 🙏🏽

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

The company hired me to lead their "Agile Transformation."
I don't know what Agile means.
Nobody does.
That's why it works.

I make $425,000 a year.
To move sticky notes.
From left to right.
On a board.
The board is digital now.
The sticky notes cost $80,000 in Jira licenses.
Progress.

Day one, I said "we need to break down silos."
Everyone nodded.
Silos are bad.
I don't know why.
But destroying them is a career.
My career.

I introduced "squads."
Squads are teams.
But disrupted.
We disrupted the teams into teams.
Different names.
Same people.
Same problems.
But Agile problems now.
Agile problems are strategic.

A senior engineer asked what we're actually changing.
I said, "The mindset."
He asked what that means.
I said, "It's a journey."
He asked where we're going.
I said, "Toward agility."
He asked what agility means.
I pointed at the sticky notes.
They were moving left to right.
That's velocity.
We have velocity now.

The VP of Engineering said two-week sprints don't fit their work.
I said, "That's waterfall thinking."
Waterfall is bad.
Like silos.
I don't know what waterfall is.
But I know it's bad.
She stopped talking.
Waterfall accusations end conversations.

We had a retrospective.
In the retro, we discussed what went wrong.
Everything went wrong.
We put it on sticky notes.
Then we moved the sticky notes.
Into a column called "Parking Lot."
The Parking Lot is where problems go to die.
It's full.
We don't look at it.
That's agile.

Velocity is up 40%.
I defined velocity.
I also defined the points.
I also defined the stories.
We're crushing it.
At the things I made up.
To measure.
Ourselves.

The CEO asked for ROI.
I showed a chart.
The chart went up.
Charts should go up.
This one did.
I didn't label the Y-axis.
Nobody asked.
Leadership is confidence.

We do standups now.
Every day.
We stand.
For 45 minutes.
Standing is agile.
Sitting is waterfall.
My legs hurt.
But we're transforming.

The transformation is now "Phase 3."
Phase 1 was assessment.
Phase 2 was implementation.
Phase 3 is "continuous improvement."
Continuous means forever.
Forever means job security.
I'm very secure.

My contract was extended.
Three more years.
For "cultural impact."
The culture is confused.
But impacted.

Agile transformation isn't about being agile.
It's about transforming.
Continuously.
Toward more transformation.
The destination is the journey.
The journey is billable.

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

@DTE_Energy
For years we keep finding dead birds at the base of a transformer in our yard. I've messaged, we even had someone come out and they did nothing but say everything looks fine. Is there literally nothing you can do to help stop killing these birds? Found 3 today.

[WarTranslated @wartranslated]

"This is essentially Russian propaganda coming from the mouth of the American president." - said Nesty and Gas, American volunteers from the 13th Brigade of the National Guard of Ukraine, "Khartia," who came to Ukraine last year to fight against the occupiers.

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

Chaos is such a cuddler. When she's not trying to bite me.

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

Here are my two kitties haring their water bowl

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

Chunky black cat with a dryer ball

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

Chunky orange cat

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

I'm just going to post cats. All cats, all the time.

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

She's less blurry in real life, but always moving

[tobi lutke @tobi]

BFCM Live on the @SphereVegas

And I mean truly live! It turns out that the Sphere can be powered by the Unreal Engine, so of course we had to go there. Place an order from your phone, see it arc in front of you!

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

I've been trying to get my vertical app drawer back for months, but @Samsung insists on making me regret buying their phone instead of just giving me this one feature I used to have
https://t.co/62voUnqsNw

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

@ChrisTaylor4046 @Xfinity @Lions Yes 😥

[Sylvia @DrinkingOutside]

Our globe is beautiful this year! It gets better every time.

[Shopify Engineering @ShopifyEng]

This year, our team pulled out all the stops to make the Black Friday Cyber Monday Globe more beautiful and interactive than it's ever been.

Watch @StrangeNative give a behind the scenes look about how we built the globe https://t.co/TXmG1h02jR

[Gil @gilgNYC]

BFCM is here! The real-time @Shopify BFCM Globe is live! 🤩 Watch sales live: https://t.co/Mbj05CksuD

I'm super impressed with the level of engineering that went into bringing this to life, so I sat down with @maca_graphics to learn more 👇