Last week, I spent ₦100,000 on a date trying to impress a girl. She liked it, but it felt like just another regular day to her. No real excitement, no memorable reaction.
Yesterday, I bought my guy shawarma and Habib yoghurt for less than ₦10,000. The guy almost kissed me out of excitement 😂. He kept thanking me all day.
This morning, he called and said, “Wallahi, you’re my best man when I get married.”
Sometimes the people who appreciate the little things are worth more than the people you’re trying so hard to impress.
If he is committing adultery or chasing after women while married. Leave the idiot, don’t settle for less…. Iskancin banza kai!! Haba, what’s wrong with our society? Kudi hauka ne????
In 2018, while working as a community mobiliser on a sexual and reproductive health and rights project in Kano State, we regularly engaged women in rural communities. During one of those sessions, a woman said to us:
“Malama, don Allah, kamar yadda kuke tara mata kuna koya mana abubuwa, don Allah ku dinga tara mazajenmu kuna nuna musu muhimmancin zuwa asibiti da neman magani. Saboda sau da yawa za ki ga muna fama da infection ko sanyi. Idan mun je asibiti an ba mu magani, ana ce mana mu gaya wa mazajenmu su zo su karɓi magani, saboda idan mun warke su ba su warke ba, za su iya sake sa mana cutar. Amma mazajenmu sai su ƙi zuwa asibiti, su ce wai muna tona musu asiri. Wani ma zai iya sakin matarsa saboda ta gaya masa ya je asibiti. Ita kuma idan an sake ta, wani lokacin samun wani mijin yana zama da wahala, saboda ana cewa ba ta iya rufa wa mijinta asiri.”
In translation, she was saying:
“Please, just as you gather women and educate us, we would appreciate it if you also engaged our husbands and taught them the importance of going to the hospital and receiving treatment for sexually transmitted infections. Many times, we suffer from infections and, when we go to the hospital, we are treated and advised to bring our husbands for treatment too, because if we recover while they remain untreated, they may infect us again. But when we ask our husbands to go to the hospital, some become offended and accuse us of exposing their shame. In some cases, a man may even divorce his wife for asking him to seek treatment. A woman divorced under such circumstances may also struggle to remarry because she becomes stigmatised and accused of being unable to conceal her husband’s shame.”
This was in 2018, and in 2026, you are promoting the dangerous idea that a “good wife” is one who hears but pretends not to hear, sees but pretends not to see and remains silent regardless of what her husband does, all in the name of preserving the dignity of marriage.
Who raised you guys to think like this?
Since when did “matar rufin asiri” come to mean a woman who must ignore persistent betrayal, silence herself and protect a grown man from the consequences of his own choices? Do you not realise that protecting the privacy of a marriage is not the same as concealing misconduct or tolerating repeated infidelity or sacrificing one’s dignity, health and peace to preserve a man’s public image.
Islam does not normalise zina or present infidelity as an ordinary male weakness that women must tolerate. It, in contrast, treats sexual immorality as a grave offence. So what makes anyone think it is acceptable to normalise cheating, or gaslight women into enabling wayward partners who behave as though infidelity is their birthright, and then condemn every woman who chooses to walk away because she cannot continue living with a man alleged to be a chronic womaniser?
Why should the responsibility for a man’s discipline, loyalty and sexual conduct be transferred to his wife? Why should she be praised for pretending not to see what threatens her emotional and physical well-being, while he is excused from accountability?
Please do not use this mindset to raise your daughters, whether you have them now or may have them in the future. This thinking is one of the reasons many women are suffering and dying in silence, are repeatedly infected with life-threatening sexually transmitted infections because they are taught that their chastity is synonymous with overlooking their husband’s inadequacies. You’re suggesting women should remain trapped in harmful marriages because society tells them that marriage is “for better or worse” and that a woman’s virtue is measured by how much humiliation, betrayal and danger she can endure without speaking.
A woman who truly loves you and wants the best for you in both worlds would never turn deaf ears or a blind eye to wrongdoing by pretending not to see it.
Ka je ka nema ilimi.
Each and every one of them, including their sponsors, their informants and even the government officials responsible for securing our lives who have failed to do so, from the president downward! Allah Ya Isa!
“The issue of Terrorists celebrating sallah shouldn’t bother Nigerians, we are winning the war against terrorism” - General Abubakar Rabe in 2015.
Only to end up kidnapped & killed by terrorists 11 years later.
I hope Christopher Musa is watching.
Another disaster we are not talking about is The National Security Adviser Nuhu Ribadu who has recorded more success in his political fight with Elrufai and running his political propaganda PR than tackling Terrorists. Nigeria is overrun by terrorists under his watch.