Droxi Kostik

I will eject my bio through the mouth as the result of involuntary muscular spasms of the stomach and oesophagus. BleK!

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Yay
- ##sockart live on http://t.co/Y2SozuCF

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Bet my little brother 5 bucks he couldn't stuff all his body holes with cherios. I lost.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Had a school outing to a kindergarten today. Bit boring till I taught a bunch of the yard apes how to brush their teeth with a sharpie.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

It's not Justin Biebers fault he was born with 2 X chromosomes.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Started calling my my brother 'ill butter'. Say it fast enough and it sounds just like 'little brother'. He has no idea.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Someone asked my mother if she'd had botox. She said she has no lines because she never smiles.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

My teacher said I had mashed banana for brains. So I stuck my finger in my ear then licked it and said 'Yep, banana'.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Yesterday my mother said I looked like a spice girl. A what girl?

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Kid at school ticked me off so during lunch I stuck a note to the wheel of his bike that said 'Spin for bad luck'.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Samurai slash to the neck - all maths teachers should get one.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Little bro fell asleep on couch. I stuck a muffin down the back of his pyjama pants

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Tip of the day: Vegetable soup in an empty icecream container looks just like vomit. Mix in grated parmesan for that 'just-barfed' smell.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Psycho stalking only works if you follow up with the silent phone call.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

People love kittens better than cats. How to keep your kitten a kitten: Put it in the freezer every night.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Stupid dog wont stop barking. I say 'Mother I'm not listening' but she won't stop. Yap yap yap!

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Word of the day: Abbreviate. As in 'I'm gonna abbreviate that bitch.'

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Enterprise gonna blow up in space. Kirk and Spock kiss just in case.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Why when they hire teachers they choose the adults with no personalities?

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

Bought a sugared donut. It's hole was all closed up and puckered. So I stuck it on a little stand and wrote 'BAMBI'S BUTTHOLE' underneath.

[Droxi Kostik @droxirox]

My mother tried to give me a sex talk. I tried not to kill myself.