Bored Teen

Wanna be funny...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Flying @ElAl is great; potbellied #kikes, #heimish smell of tuna fish and #minyanim blocking the restroom-
So thank God I'm flying Austrian.

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Returning to Israel is sometimes just as hard as coming home to America... But at least there, you dont have to go looking for a bathroom...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Why dont we count down the days of #sefirah? Cuz #God knew we'll all forget somewhere in the beginning, so why make us say the longer ones?!

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

I dont blame those #kikes at Royal Clothing for their mediocre service and quality. Its just obvious that they dont know what "Royal" means.

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Had health inspectors been #kikes, they would've closed down any establishment that has a picture of Reb Shayala Kerestirer on its walls...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Its sad to think of what us Hassidic #kikes have to do to be a famous spoken-about celebrity. Oy!
What we do to be featured on @NRHotline...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Imagine a bunch of people paying to see you toiveling yourself in the #mikva... Scary, eh?
Just think how #aquarium fish must be feeling...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Some #kike told me that the #cholent I cooked up tastes like ****...
Which leads to me wonder- exactly when he ate #dreck last...

#Hmmmm...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Being a backseat driver can sometimes save your life... Especially in the case of a head-on collision.

Or when the cops pull you over...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Not being able to cut our hair IS terribly sad... Finally having your long-awaited "tchup" grow in only to have to snip it off...

#sefira

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

No wonder 24,000 of Reb Akiva's students died. Living in a world where off-tune choirs with no background's called "music" sucks...

#sefira

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Twitter is all about jobless dudes who follow other jobless dudes who complain of being jobless dudes- all while making money for @Twitter.

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Why the heck do we feel we need a "car-coat?!"
Stupid #kike- next time use all that money you spent, to just repair your vehicle's heating!

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

And chain-smoking eight #joints one after the other, doesnt mean you're addicted to #weed...
It just means you've been #smoking broccolli...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Being in #mir and smoking 3 packs of #cigarettes a day, doesnt mean you're addicted. It just means your father's giving you lots of money...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

I really, really, don't want to know what the guy who discovered that you can drink cow milk's issues were...
(Probably something like XYZ.)

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

I was in middle of reading a #goyishe magazine when #God sent an angel in the form of a #pigeon to white-out some words...

#crap #literally

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

Sitting on my porcelain throne thinking, what could possibly go wrong on such a glorious morning...
Damn! I knew it- where are the tissues?!

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

I think @realdonaldtrump could solve the imigrant crisis by sending all Mexicans to #Yeshiva and #Kollel-
then they'll stop stealing jobs...

[Bored Teen @drycrax]

How can my parents tell me to stay here cuz #Mir is too chilled- when they live in a place where you can buy French fries after 11 o'clock?!