Duncan Hamilton

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

That awkward moment when you lean in to hug someone sexy and bump your head on the mirror. http://t.co/vlI4CKTV

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

http://t.co/ZgU1wcb7 "I made six figures last year." - Extremely lazy G.I. Joe employee.

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

http://t.co/2BFTA1i6 I just want a car with pop-up headlights. Do they still make those? Love would be good too.

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

http://t.co/eRFtyUwZ Wish I wasn't raising my kids in an era where mediocrity was celebrated.

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

Under the sea, under the sea...wouldn't the water pressure crush mermaids, realistically? http://t.co/o4bxzmP5

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

Just so you know, I am not going to be RTing any more racist jokes. Racism is a crime and crimes are for black people. http://bitly.xaijo.c

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

Body scans and genital fondlings would save more lives if our Government was paying to have them done in hospitals rather than airports. ht

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

If at first you don’t succeed… try try being redundant. http://t.co/xDIxhCxJ

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

"Haha, you thought I was a quarter." -nickels http://t.co/gE4SsXIL

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

http://t.co/xZmeD5g4 Lol

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

Life is not fair, but life is not fair for everyone. That makes life fair

[Duncan Hamilton @duncanham]

Disappointed in the Baja Men for never writing a song about putting the dogs back in