Ben Menard

What the world needs is the opinion of one more straight white guy.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

@BadRabbits I've seen you guys twice in Seattle and brought new people both times who now get it. If you were to show up at the Wild Buffalo in Bellingham, I would flood the show to the best of my ability.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

@BadRabbits BR financial advice all day!

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

@ArleneDickinson @cbcdragon "I no longer respect your presentation, largely because you smell so bad."

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

@alsexmckay Or the evil proctologist Dr. Coldfinger.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

"I wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire!"
@rkelly, lying.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

I think the funniest thing about boners, is boners.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

So what if I googled "alcohol content lemon extract"?

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

Life is like a box of chocolates: thrown away once it's used and empty.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

Im less #Netflixandchill than stare in silence in the dark and softly weep.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

Allow me to play devil's advocate here: Satan is awesome, you guys.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

If I had a dollar for everytime I fucked up, I'd have the same amount of guilt, shame, and regret. But more dollars.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

Oh sure gay people being able to marry is all anyone can talk about. BUT DID YOU KNOW THEYVE BEEN ABLE TO VOTE THIS WHOLE TIME!?

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

I bet a lot of gay racists don't really know HOW to feel today.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

If chocolate milk comes from Brown cows, cookies and cream comes from cows with kidney stones.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

I think my favorite thing about #politics and #worldevents is some day I will die and never have to hear about them again.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

I woke up in the middle of the night really thirsty so I ate a bunch of salt and vinegar potato chips. Cuz Im complicated.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

If I ever read a horoscope that says "This is all total bullshit" I'll know its true and then be very confused.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

I walk in alleys a lot. Not because of shortcuts, I just know my place.

[Ben Menard @dvorcdalcoholic]

I'm not racist, some of my best friends are inherently inferior.