When my son sleeps in our bed with us we sleep in the form of an “H” shape with my son as the cross peace… or an upside down “A” as if to say “If he wasn’t here, we totally would have”.
#parenting#toddler#kids#sleep
My wife says I should drink more water so I added an extra can of water to our Campbell’s soup. Haha that’s two cans of water to the one of concentrate.. fuck her and her smooth skin she rode on in.
#skincare#water#hydrohomie#hydration#ownboss#stuborn
@tombomp @ryan_gunther The British museum is that girl that spent the night over but now owns my sweater.. She has a lot of guys sweaters. Damn, that was my one sweater.
My wife and I have very different views on flight comfort vs cost.
Her (5’4”)- If it’s an extra $100 it’s worth it for the leg room.
Me (5’11”)- If they had seats that were $100 cheaper in “spooning class” I’d take them.
#airtravel#westjet#aircanada#airplane#airport#travel
I wish house plants were as easy to grow a mold. My wife wouldn’t cry as much when she comes back from trips.
“Ya babe, of course everything is still alive… And you won’t believe how much Monstera started growing in the basement!”
#houseplants#plants#mold#marriage#plant
Fun Fact- Mule ears can rotate 180 degrees. That is why they are notorious for being stubborn. They never have to face music.
#mule#stubborn#farm#ranch#horse#horses
My brother finally twisted my arm and got me to join his BJJ gym. Turns out it’s called a “Kimura” And it’s the number one way to force someone to join your gym.
#BJJ#Kimura#mma#gym
My toaster is soooo easy. You just put the bread in and push down the lever. When the smoke detector goes off you know you should have popped it 5 minutes ago. Easy.
#morning#breakfast#toast#toaster#burn
Before getting a personal jet pack that can go 100 ft off the ground you should be forced to wipe out on a skateboard which is zero feet off the ground. So you know how absolutely fucked you’re about to become.
#jetpack#skateboard#skateboarding#gravity