eq

19 | disc: 9olll | I play games ၄၃
dm 4 new friends!! - ,, venting/nsfw + sfw ✎

[eq @e01l1]

never. forget. how. he. made. you. feel.
(more below in comments)

[eq @e01l1]

<3

[eq @e01l1]

as SOON as I get home im showering then going the fuck to sleep idc I need sleep bruh🫩

[eq @e01l1]

I haven’t got ANY sleep IN HOURS HELP ME its so fucking hot out here dawg🫩

[eq @e01l1]

@sug_looo Thank you :)

[eq @e01l1]

just woke up <3

[𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗺𝗺𝘆💗 @Urfv_shammy]

my type in men??? Provider, dominant, protector, problem solved, loverboy & weak in the knees about me.

[eq @e01l1]

When he says he likes waking up & seeing my face or likes pics of me in general so I take pictures any chance I get & send it to him >>>>

[eq @e01l1]

I’m sorry to anyone who keeps going to my page and im still talking about him.

Trauma bonds/situationships (I hate calling it that because I wanted more) take longer to heal from because im mourning potential.

Usually relationships have a beginning, middle and end with closure. These situations don’t.

So it will take me some take maybe a month maybe 3-6 months.

So if you don’t like it, unfollow & block me. I am grieving rn but I am NEVER going back. He’s blocked. So forgive me for my tweets.

[eq @e01l1]

I deleted every pic of him, including the ones I had in a hidden folder so I wouldn’t look.

It was hard. But I had to.

[eq @e01l1]

Ill never go back to you ever again as long as Im breathing air.

Unless some miracle by the lord happens & he lead you back to me changed.

[eq @e01l1]

The only reason why I do regret how I treated him is because it was unnecessary.

But he was reaction and the way of handling it didn’t make it better either. He could’ve been more patient, mature, understanding and less verbally abusive towards me.

I am unhealed, and I told him that. He said it isn’t his job to heal OR fix me, but it wasn’t right for him to break me. A healthy partner creates a safe environment where healing is possible.

But you only seen me as a “friend” and entertainment.. never as a partner or smb potentially to be with.

[eq @e01l1]

I miss him then I realize I just miss the routine the on and off, the unadding & readding, the unblocking & blocking.

We both said hurtful things to each other but I think about stuff ive said.. and how it was out of line like calling him the f slur while knowing what he been through & my nonchalant attitude towards him in the beginning.

I regret the way I did treat him, yes but it was for a reason & I could’ve handled it better emotionally, but ik that isnt me.. im not an angry, mean person UNLESS provoked or I feel unseen/unheard after so many times.

I have my own breaking point.

[eq @e01l1]

Im crying because I was reading the messages and it just flashed backed me (ik thats not a word lol) to when it happened.. and how I felt.

How my chest tightened a little bit and my eyes started to water like I felt that tingly sensation inside me burning.. I was stressed, crying and walking on eggshells with this man.

I told him this.. he never cared.

[eq @e01l1]

he said a lot of hurtful things but these are the ones that hurt me the most.. that I think of..

[eq @e01l1]

never. forget. how. he. made. you. feel.
(more below in comments)

[eq @e01l1]

never. forget. how. he. made. you. feel.
(more below in comments)

[eq @e01l1]

I just realized he gave off the impression he would still go back to people he have dated and that he likely still talks to his exes..

Yea uhm.. yuck! Definitely will not go back🤣😭

[eq @e01l1]

@almasod1 Thank you so much!!! :D

[eq @e01l1]

Yall I be on discord streaming and stuff to my friends so don’t be afraid to ask to game with me or ask to streamssss

Im planning on making a new discord/nsfw server.. but idk who imma inv or where to start!

#discord #xbox #pc #laptop #TwitterGrowth #CommunityCare #gaming #GamerLife #StreamingNow #mutuals #friends #nsfwtwt #blacktaboo #l

[eq @e01l1]

@pr3ttyphatslut9 I usually order my fans off of tiktok shop but imma see if they have better ones online

[eq @e01l1]

work was tiring finna carry this fan w/ me at all times its too hot😭