ej

I only like museums. & sleeping. & Sunkist.

[ej @e_lichter]

Daytime tv is total trash.

[ej @e_lichter]

As a bears fan this feels illegal, but I’m team Aaron Rodgers.

[ej @e_lichter]

@McAlisterCRB Maybe don’t include the video of Rodman kicking the camera man for training purposes.

[ej @e_lichter]

@Caleboz This tweet didn’t age well.

[ej @e_lichter]

Stanley is really just the new Nalgene bottle for our generation. IYKYK.

[ej @e_lichter]

Every third chip from chipotle is stale. Don’t @ me.

[ej @e_lichter]

Does anyone else constantly forget what year it is?

[ej @e_lichter]

Apparently there must’ve been a bracelet dress code/requirement for attending a Taylor Swift Concert. Is every craft store out of beads now? Jw.

[ej @e_lichter]

Imagine thinking you’re just as worthy as someone that voluntarily served our country and that your education should also be paid for by taxpayers.

[ej @e_lichter]

Everyone: I can’t decide who your baby looks like! Do you think it looks more like you or Kyler!?
Me: uhhh I don’t know… he looks like a baby…?

[ej @e_lichter]

I can’t believe there are still people out there that think pineapple goes on pizza.

[ej @e_lichter]

If the subject line of a work email is so long you can’t read it all, it should be standard practice to just immediately delete the entire email. The content of the email is going to be complete garbage and likely someone blaming you for something they did.

[ej @e_lichter]

Remember when @amazon shipping only took two days? I miss 2019.

[ej @e_lichter]

Am I the only one that thinks it’s odd to refer to your baby as your best friend? You can’t even have a conversation with the kid yet. Personally, I prefer friends that don’t spit up on me, pee on me, and wake me up at all hours of the night.

[ej @e_lichter]

Remember when you could eat at Chipotle and spend less than $10? Those were the days.

[ej @e_lichter]

Update: I put him in a real outfit today and he had his third ever blow out. His backup outfit was a onesie. When I picked him up the little girls asked if he was already in his pajamas. I tried explaining that sometimes babies wear onesies. They weren’t having it. I can’t win.

[ej @e_lichter]

For the first 2 days of daycare, I put RJ in a onesie bc every parent can agree onesies are the easiest option. But then one of the girls at daycare asked me “why does Baby Ryan always wear pajamas?” So now I’ll be putting him in a real outfit. I got bullied by a 3 year old.

[ej @e_lichter]

@midwestern_ope @LizRudloff

[ej @e_lichter]

There’s nothing that’ll ruin your morning faster than a Crow Tow commercial. Fuck those guys.

[ej @e_lichter]

@BEisenhart In their defense, the first day with decent weather after January 1 could be in May