Earl Fando 🇺🇦

You've read worse. The Dictionary of Unfortunate Ideas. Squirrel whisperer. Veracity of tweets & profile may vary. Never explain a joke.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

You mess with Harpo Marx, you get the horns.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@tomselliott The results? No one will pay the fares.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@RapidResponse47 It’s funny because the President is corrupt!

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@kadmitriev “Привет, полезные идиоты!”
“What did he say?”
“Oh, well… He said, ‘Hello Steve and Jared!’”

[Norm Macdonald Joke of the Day @NormSNLJokes]

In a recent interview on the subject of parenting, Jane Fonda admitted that it wasn't easy to talk to her children about sex. But she felt it was necessary because she did not want them to learn about sex the way that she did:

By reading North Vietnamese propaganda pamphlets.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@clashreport He cracks this line with all self-satisfaction of a little kid making his first success on a kiddy potty.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@RepGregSteube

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@livescore This assumes Liverpool would have scored the penalty.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@ABC Was a window involved?

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

These changes would have to be approved by Congress. (Spoiler alert: They won’t.) Only Captain Bone Spurs would be stupid enough to troll like this on a holiday where we honor those who did serve.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@WhiteHouse One can easily imagine the social media person posting this curled up in a fetal position and muttering, “Patriots in control,” over and over again.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

I remember when the only famous Kushner was Don. Good times.

[Republicans against Trump @RpsAgainstTrump]

Jared Kushner: “If Europe could identify one person to speak on their behalf, that would be a bigger achievement than getting the Russians to include them in the negotiations.”

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@RpsAgainstTrump The Russians don’t have no say in it, mate.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@front_ukrainian The conditions: $$$$$$$$$$

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@SherASafi @karolineleavitt @SecWar @WillCainShow @PeteHegseth

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@SkyNews Stay away from windows!

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@WhiteHouse You mad, bro?

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@iowahawkblog I have a feeling she’s real and in on it, but it’s a good gag regardless.

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@WhiteHouse

[Earl Fando 🇺🇦 @earlfando]

@HaytersTV Whatever Rio’s smoking, it’s too strong for him.