Emily Carter

I’m too sober for this shit / my life is just a continuous line of ‘well shit’ moments

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@FrankLynyrd Bro you can’t use sims as a way to distract you from your anxiety ;)

[kayleigh @hello__troublee]

*car drives down the street loudly beeping his horn*

S’cuse me mate it’s a sunday, please be considerate of those hungover

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

‘All dogs go to heaven’ therefore there really are no bad dogs. Just bad owners

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

Honestly just want someone who’s going to surprise me with like a cactus or roses 😂💔

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

Can someone make me a version of Women like me without niki manaj pls and thx x

[Serendipity @deleted____accv]

I forgive you. Even though I know you don’t really regret what you did. I haven’t forgiven you so you can feel less guilty, I’ve forgiven you so that I can try to finally be happy.

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@gregjames @BBCR1 Natasha beddingfield I wanna have your babies

[Horse of the Year Show @hoystweet]

Ode to the Horse🐴

Thank you Martin Clunes for reading it so perfectly to our incredible horses.

#HOYS2018
#HOYS70YEARS

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

Tfw your bestie send you screenshots of a tinder account 👍🏻😂

[kayleigh @hello__troublee]

I have a friend Bob, who when he knows my anxiety and shit is at playing up he’ll tag me in endless dog memes... Get you a friend like Bob

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

Why the FUCK are all the good Disney teddies aimed at babies? The fuck they gunna do with it? Be sick on it? BITCH I WILL LOVE THAT FREAKING DUMBO TEDDY MORE THAN THAT SNIVELLING CRAP SACK STOP MAKING THEM SO STUPIDLY BABY LIKE

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@FrankLynyrd I don’t trust people who spell their name ‘trump’ and pronounce it ‘trump’ idk man I just get the impression they’re all entitled pieces of shit?

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@FrankLynyrd No help 4 u

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@LoveIsland Honestly jack shut the fuck up. You instigated that kiss then blamed G. You’re a piece of shit you should’ve been dumped.

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

Safe to say she doesn’t like meg
#lovelsland #loveislandmeg

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@FrankLynyrd Grandad?😱

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

Love island contestants who are muggy:

1. You
2. Cant
3. Just
4. Make
5. Assumptions
6. Off
7. A
8. T.V
9. Show
10. Meg

#loveIsland   #LoveIslandmegan

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

I don’t trust people who don’t like pizza

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

@Normal_Ginger Did you tell his wife he loved her?

[Emily Carter @ecarter998]

How I know my bestie is my bestie:
Sends me a message at 5:30 in the afternoon asking if I’m awake 🙄