Aishat Ashir

[Ibironke Khadeejah Quadri @ronkecarew]

Post partum depression and psychosis may not make sense to many but it's definitely real.

Ectreme care and support is required for the woman not to be a danger to Herself and others around Her.

As someone who has nursed patient suffering from both and as someone who has experienced the depressive phase of it and was nursed back to health with immense support and medication by my parents.
I genuinely thank you for this balanced take

[Sir Dickson @Wizarab10]

I've seen women carry the bills alone because the man was in his low moment and the women were overwhelmed. They are not overwhelmed because theynare women. They were overwhelmed because it is a tough and frustrating responsibility to carry all the bills alone on a low and average income. A man on same income would be overwhelmed and that is why many of them die young.

I beg you to marry a woman you can have a good relationship with, where you are both open and honest about your finances and join resources together to run your home. I want you to stay alive and in good health. Na you sabi

[منيرة بنت عبد السلام 🦋🌷🌼 @_muneeroh]

I asked Allah for peace and He blessed me with a husband who makes my heart feel safe, loved, and at ease. Truly, Allah answers in the most beautiful ways. 😇

[Foundational Nupe Lawyer @egi_nupe]

Men, especially fathers, we need to do better. Paying all the bills alone does not make you a good father or husband. In fact, it is not a flex that most of us think it is. A lot of us are lacking in other aspects of our family lives and believe once we sort all the bills, then every other thing is sorted or will be handled by the mothers.

Being present in the lives of your children is not an exclusive reserve of your wife or their mother. It is so bad that some people do not know their children's blood group, let alone create bonding time with their children. Who are your children's friends in school and neighbourhood? What are their favourite foods, TV channels, books, shoes, clothes?

Do you know your children's shoe sizes and clothes sizes? Do you know their teacher's names? Who is the head of schools they attend? Do you have their contact numbers? Do you know your children's allergies? Do you know their best subjects? Do you know their weakest subjects? Do you attend their school activities or events? Do you monitor their academic progress in school or at home? Do you have random conversations with them? At what stage of their lives do you have a sit-down with them and have serious conversations about life, morals, people, values, rules and consequences?

We cannot continue to use the excuses of work and sorting bills and lose sight of others important things.

Let us do better please.

[HalālPair @halal_pair]

Two qualities define you: your patience during times of scarcity and your attitude when abundance is present.

[SeniorMan🪐 @idreezsadam1]

My younger brother became a father at 17.

When the girl got pregnant, he immediately started making excuses.

“We’re not together anymore. Why should I be responsible?”

My father listened quietly. No shouting. No beating. No long lecture.

He simply told him:

“You may not be ready to be a father, but you are already responsible for the life you helped create.”

The next Saturday, Dad woke him up before sunrise and took him to work.

For months, my brother worked alongside him. Whatever he earned, part of it went toward the baby’s needs.

One evening, he got frustrated.

“Dad, how long is this going to continue? When will I finally have my own money?”

My father looked at him and said:

“The day you stop asking what this child is costing you and start asking what this child needs from you.”

That statement changed him.

He stopped seeing fatherhood as punishment and started seeing it as responsibility.

End.

[Glorious God @GloriousGod01]

Dear Men,

Once you choose a wife for yourself, you have chosen your destiny. Please chose a good woman for yourself. Leave yansh aside, leave perfect shape, leave clean skin. The question should be: Can this woman make life easier for me or make it harder?

Please ask yourself that question before you proceed to pay her bride price.

Most importantly, don't beg any woman to marry you. Don't do that. Don't kneel down to propose (synonymous with begging). Nobody will live in the marriage with you. You will carry your cross alone.

Imagine getting married to a woman you provide fully for, who still steals from you and even inflate the children's school fees.

Above all, love God.

[BIG SILVO @silvoxbtc]

Have you noticed that some of those young women who got married a few years ago—the ones who used to bombard us with their husband’s birthday pictures, especially in the first year—no longer do it?

Do you know why?Reality has hit them.

Some have realized that the man they married is not the same as the man they now call their husband.

[👑K I N G👑 @kingsuleiman27]

I have a question:

Let’s say a father is at the airport alone with his 5 year old daughter and she needs to use the restroom. She’s too young to go in alone, so he has to accompany her. Does he take her into the men’s restroom or walk into the women’s restroom with her?

[👳🏾‍♂️Mufti Of Ilorin Online 👳🏾‍♂️ @Adamthallith]

Ojy Okpe: Do you still plan on having a male child because in Kano, they believe you need a son to carry the family legacy?

Alike Dangote: I am not forcing it, God controls everything, what if I have a son and he brings down all I’ve built? And I also don’t think a son will do anything better than what my three daughters have done.

[Mayowa Sheikhspeare @CoveredInWords]

We often think of life only as something physical, but our hearts need life too. A person can go through their day while their heart feels distant, distracted, or spiritually tired. Allah is Al-Muḥyī, the One who gives life.

[Aishat Ashir @eesha_ashir]

I can bodly say I never task a man for any until I got married

[Halimah Ahmed (Tiwal'adire) @ahmedhalimah02]

I was in a relationship with my husband for 5 solid years, before marriage and he never paid for a single thing on the list for me till I became his legal responsibility.

Dear Nigerian ladies, please do better, please have bragging rights.
Let's earn some respect!

[HalālPair @halal_pair]

If losing them gave you your peace back, then maybe it wasn’t really a loss—it was a blessing. 🤍

Not everyone who leaves your life is meant to be chased. Sometimes, letting go is how you find yourself again.

Protect your peace. Choose yourself. Keep moving forward.

[Sara @piousdeenn]

Imam Al nawawi was scared to get married because of how much rights Allah has given the wife over her husband, he was afraid he wouldn't be able to fulfill all her rights.

And today's men talk about having 2,3,4 wives like it's a joke.

[Jeremy @jerry_emy]

This is why I got married sha.
Children are added icing to the cake.
I don't want to be wasting companionship on temporary people.

Moreover children are so many in the world. You can get as many as you wish from care homes.
But a wife is rare.

[kindy | Fashion girlie @Mmesoma_001]

If your partner can't fully access your phone in a relationship, you both are just playing games.

Nakedness is the most shameful thing anyone can share with anyone but if you can comfortably share it with your partner unashamed but have a problem with your phone, then you have a big problem.

[Rock it @Rockit015]

This made me remember when I was in 100lvl, my younger brother gave someone 2100 to give me in ilorin, all the way from Lagos 😭
He called with my mum’s phone the previous day that I should send him money, I told him I don’t have any money.

My mum called back the next day that my brother gave her 2100 cash to send to me and she told him that POS will collect 100 naira oo 😂
He said she should find someone that’s coming to ilorin that I’ll need the 100 naira 😭😭

Love all my brothers so much🥹❤️

[Mayowa Sheikhspeare @CoveredInWords]

Love doesn’t always have to be about what someone can give us. One of the most beautiful forms of love is to care for someone for the sake of Allah. You love them because they remind you of Allah, support you in goodness, or simply because you want good for them for His sake.

[Glorious God @GloriousGod01]

I have been using my generator to pump water for everyone in my compound since last year. Free of charge.

On wednesday evening it broke down. Repairs cost me 80,000 naira. I went to the group chat, broke down the cost and asked each person to contribute 3,000 naira. I would cover the balance.

Only two people paid. I even heard one of the girls say, "Na you get generator, but na we you expect to fix am?"

I fixed it myself. But...

I decided to show them my extreme level of pettiness.

Every night between 2 and 3am, I would pump water for 5 minutes to fill my two drums, then leave the tap running until the tank was empty.

They woke up to nothing every morning.

This morning they went to the other guy with a big generator to help pump the water. He refused. His excuse? "I don't want to spoil my generator."

Alerts started coming in. 3,000 naira each.

I went to the group, and told them the price was now 8,000 naira or they could drop their account for a refund.

They all sent the 8,000 naira.

Above all, love God.

[Foundational Nupe Lawyer @egi_nupe]

People don’t leave marriages because love died.
They leave because other things became heavier than love could carry. When someone sits across my desk for a consultation on dissolution of marriage, I always ask one last question, the most important one: Do you still love him/her?
A substantial number still do.

After more than a decade of handling these matters, that answer no longer surprises me. What surprises people is the next part. Love is rarely the reason the marriage ends. What ends it are the issues that were allowed to grow while everyone kept saying “but I still love you.”

The daily disrespect that was excused and built up to the point of no more excuses. The emotional withdrawal that was tolerated. The financial chaos or control that was “just a phase.” The lack of partnership that was dressed up as “we’re just different.” The safety, physical or emotional that was slowly eroded. The children who were becoming collateral damage. The vision of life that no longer matched, no matter how much affection remained.

Love can survive a lot. It cannot indefinitely survive being asked to do the work of everything else that was ignored. That is why many people walk into a lawyer’s office still carrying love for the person they are about to leave. They are not leaving the love. They are leaving the conditions that made staying unsustainable. The marriage did not fail because love disappeared. It failed because other problems were treated as smaller than they actually were. But the society may never understand that it is better to put an asunder to what was thought to last forever.