Sami Sutker

I can't help that I kick ass all the time!!!
And by all the time I mean every waking second otherwise I'm snoring and drooling. Which is awesome as well.

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

"Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly."
- Rose Franken

#mangina #amazing #clogsandsweatercapes

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

I really need to stop eating or get a job that makes me think less about food. Btw anyone know if subway is hiring?
#2birds1stone

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

Men sneeze like elephants
#Shame

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

Balls this is a long ass day

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@julezmac I have. He didn't know how staple paper. He had to be nice due his immense stupidity.

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

Fan meet shit.

They totally hit off.

#mylousyday #RoyalBoobies #cashinginwithtjmillerbestpodcast #DescribeRomneyInOneWord #Cubs

[Owen Benjamin 🐻 @OwenBenjamin]

You are more in control of your life and your future than you think.

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@rhettmiller You guys put on a great show last night! I had a blast despite that my friends now have audio & video blackmail on me for life.

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

If I scratch my crotch does that mean someone got gonorrhea in Afrika?
#butterflyeffect #childrenshospital #dinnerwithstars #eastwooding

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

Clooney worked on his personality cuz in his 20's-he was slightly cute & 30's- stud we all know & luv. #Truth #itgetsbetter #chelsealately

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@lenadunham no it's either busy people or really lazy bums that just woke up.

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

In the spirit of being of awesome...it's been my pleasure. #LateNightConfessions #VEGAS #Ugh @rhettmiller

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

The good thing about farting is that it really clears the air...if you toot correctly.
#damnskippy #LarryKingNow #IAmNotARepublicanBecause

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

How can one crave food when they have a gurgly stomach?
I'm experiencing this now & need guidance to this query.
#slutsunite

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

Leaky faucets are not ACCEPTABLE

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

I'm about to go on a new health kick & hopefully this time I'll reach my wet dream weight! #ClosingCeremony #onecrazyworld #jeah #NoH8

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@domirrera Thanks for razzing my nephew & I last night! We had a great time :)

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@ALauwasser tell Ralph Sandwich I say hola

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@marcmaron yes, but at least you can say you went more than 2 miles in 30mim if you don't stop to eat food.

[Sami Sutker @effensamantha]

@JenKirkman I enjoyed your show & how the random train sound didn't eff up your jokes.