Cassie ⚯͛

But this is not wonderland. And you are not Alice.

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

I make the cutest babies🥹

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

I’m deleting my weather apps. I’m done getting excited about snow and preparing for fun just for me and Elliott to be let down. I hate it here

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

@Luvs honestly it smells like air freshener. We now have to throw away a HUGE case of diapers

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

@Luvs as a parent who has used Luvs for years… we got a new box that smells VERY awful of chemicals😭

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

@PjHarlin YOU KNO

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Sometimes I forget to block people on things they deserve to be blocked on🫠

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Me 🤝 getting kicked out of bars

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

The flared bottoms?! THE PAINTED TOES?! She kills me🇺🇸

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Me and my BPD against the world

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

I just drank an entire sprite without burping and I believe it is the equivalent of swallowing a large overinflated balloon

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

*when my child’s father says he will take her while she’s crying*

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

@MrBeast “you can sacrifice yourself”

My five year old “OH MY
GOD THEY ARE ALL DEAD”

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

@MrBeast saying “do you want to sacrifice yourself?”

My 5 year old “OH MY GOD THEY ARE ALL DEAD”

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Somebody needs to come hang out with these kids so I can get stuff done😭

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

At 31 years old I just had to get up in the middle of the night, risk waking up my sleeping 3 month old, just so I could move 2 pieces of clothing that were hanging on the back of my bedroom door - because it looked like the girl from The Ring & I could convince myself otherwise

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Elliott “mommy why do you hate daddy pig so much”

Like bro have you seen him?! Heard his snort?? He’s terrifying

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

I just wanna say daddy pig is fucking terrifying

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Standing in the bedroom tonight and Elliott yells “OH MY GOD. HOLY SHIT. FUCK” so I immediately start having a heart attack and yelling bc I thought something was behind me (ghost/killer)

Turns out it was a spider. It was kinda big though so I’ll give him that

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Will is a lucky man🥴

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

*My future husband thinking he will be coming home to a home cooked meal and 2 loving children*

Reality: *me manic cleaning, listening to La Dispute, and drinking a beer while the 5 year old destroys the living room and dinner is eating a cold meal from DoorDash*

[Cassie ⚯͛ @eiissac]

Both of my kids are sleeping peacefully. What am I doing? Sitting here wide awake riddled with anxiety