ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横

the skeletons in your closet have opened the door and they've started talking

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

"There's no such thing as tigers, now go to bed!" - parents 20 years from now

[ናቱ @ImpoliteSkeptic]

If this gets 200 faves I will not get ice cream

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

@BushRangerz unfortunately i just have very few positive things to say about anything and didn't wanna upload an old man yells at cloud podcast

[crazy ass moments in nu metal history @numetal_moment]

"re-arranged" by limp bizkit (1999)

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

Bare minimum for holding a conversation: NepentheZ, iTemp, Chris Smoove, Loosemore, Wings of Redemption, Pluffnub, Bateson87, Hutch, WoodysGamertag, BarcaBoy, TJDFIFA, ImpoliteSkeptic

[λέων @Daseincel]

Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Dante, Goethe, Homer, Tolstoy, Aristotle, Pushkin, Blake, Lermontov, Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, Cellini, Thucydides, Tacitus, Montaigne, Virgil, Shakespeare, Stendhal, Cellini, Machiavelli, Melville, Milton, Conrad, Rimbaud and Hölderlin.

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

@JAMIE_0728 please let me know what you think of it

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

@azerty27891147 worse

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

if his name was john alexander-arnold, there's no way he'd be allowed to have "john 12" on his jersey

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

every black mirror episode: "welcome to the junipero hostel on juniper street, check out the local san juniper bar next to the san junipero internet café but beware of the mysterious saint juniper hospital on west juniperio street"

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

maybe the great filter is prosperity

[Sonny Bunch @SonnyBunch]

It will never cease to amaze that Americans basically just got bored of having the best lives on the planet so they elected a lunatic to blow it up in the hopes of building some microwave factories for their children to find meaning in.

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

i'm going to become the joker

[Inevitable West @Inevitablewest]

🚨BREAKING: Conor McGregor erupts on the White House podium:

“Illegal migration is out of control. Some towns have been completely overrun, where the Irish are becoming a minority. There will be no homeland!”

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

every other tweet on my timeline these days is something like "this generational rizz aura needs to be studied" and it's just a video of adolf hitler shouting at a nazi rally in 1939

[Damin Toell @damintoell]

I’m not “pro-Russia,” you fool, I just take their side on everything, always find them to be blameless, and think their country is a paradise for white Christian men.

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

this would be a really good point if andrew tate hadn't literally admitted on several separate occasions to not only committing countless crimes but did so with the belief that he could bribe his way out of prison

[Michael Tracey @mtracey]

Tate hasn’t been convicted of anything. You can object to him on various grounds, but the imputation of criminal guilt, when none has been proven in any court, is unseemly

[Chris Kavanagh @C_Kavanagh]

Modern MAGA conservatives seem to have two primary characteristics: 1) they are unadulterated sycophants and 2) they lack any commitment to values beyond a petulant & preening selfishness.

[Jesse Singal @jessesingal]

If Trump would grant Volodymyr Zelensky (head of a country invaded by Russia, w/countless dead soldiers and civilians) a fraction of the grace and open-mindedness he has granted Andrew Tate (accused rapist/sex trafficker), that would be good

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

this is genuinely the worst tweet i have ever seen

[Emirates FA Cup @EmiratesFACup]

Amad Diallo is starting to become THE man at Manchester United. The streets already knew he was a big-time baller, but he’s had to patiently wait for his opportunity since arriving at Old Trafford. Now, the wings of the Theatre of Dreams are his own. He gave United an iconic moment with his winner against Liverpool in last season’s quarter-final, helping them march on to silverware. But this season, the Ivorian has truly kicked on - 16 goal contributions already. And yet, Amadinho’s game has been about more than just numbers. He’s become a fan favourite and a real jewel in Rúben Amorim’s side since his appointment. The kind of player who gets you off your seat - or makes you rewind in sheer disbelief at what you’ve just witnessed. And at just 22, there’s still plenty of room for him to grow. Looking for a player to shine in the fourth round? You’d be Amad not to back Diallo.

His time is now.

#EmiratesFACup

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

i started a new job yesterday and had to give a speech to my new colleagues and some of the stakeholders. at some point i got kinda distracted thinking about my favourite video game and i accidentally did a nazi salute (twice). anyone else ever had this happen?

[ｅｌｄｅｎｉｒｏ き横 @eldeniro90]

the acronym folder in my brain is completely full and every day i google what "oomf" means and then forget within about twelve hours. also where did it even come from? nobody asked me if we were gonna start casually using new acronyms like that