elijah

he/him - wendy wu enthusiast

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

an old woman stopped me on the street to tell me I look like a cartoon character

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@ItsHaailey don’t be shy, drop his name 🤪

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@rayannonymous @siwaraldaoud @SunniBased @thetranshijabi i think an entire field of science and medicine would disagree with your sad excuse for a twitter account

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@BriannaMcEldon 😗

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

every day i go to work, my stomach is like “no u won’t” and then proceeds to fuck me up. but only when i’m at work? what is this? thoughts?

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@katya_zamo fly like a g6

[justin @farringt0n]

mentally i am here

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

it’s almost like y’all don’t understand how the government works? like as though he was some all powerful dictator who could’ve turned the country around? the senate was against him. the man did what he could have

[withered old crone 🥀🇵🇸 @FlatEartherKitt]

obama be like “someone should’ve done something about this” every single day.

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@emilyannemikos @screencrafting congrats!!!!

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

been building a lot of muscle recently!

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@king1091 @Alyssa_Milano that’s true!!!

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

*me putting on my running shoes*
lilli: where are your birkenstocks?
me: i don’t have any?
lilli: you know, your doofenshmirtz!
me: my blundstones?
lilli: ya!!!!!

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@GibiOfficial you have created such safe spaces on the internet,, just thank you :,)

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

Normal people: I left my sunglasses in the car.

Jeep Owners: I Jeeped my Jeepgoggles in the Jeep™

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

@trixiemattel my DAD bitch. he loves that shit

[em @DI0RSBABY]

they are on a date!!

[elijah @elijahfelstead]

PSA: lilli is very good

[ShaCrowSpeaks @shathecrow]

can we talk about how ms. hayley williams ate this song with her bare hands no utensils