elizabeth tobin

Come for the mom tweets, stay for the self care tweets.

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

If I give you a plant baby we are bonded for life sorry I don't make the rules, bro. (I do)

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

Juniper just told me "Mommy's music goes 'skkshhhhhhhhh'" because we listen to white noise to fall asleep. 😅

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

I wonder if they have a "sorry I didn't tell you about your grandma's funeral" cards because if so, can't wait to receive 10 of those in the mail.

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

Louis and I are deleting phone numbers and every time we do we say "whomp whomp" and it's truly a spa day for the soul

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

I just want to know about @chrisdelia being in that episode of Monk that one time. Nothing specific just that he was there.

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

@BlueSteeleTV Being a parent is the best if you like saying "don't put that in your mouth!" Followed by "told you"

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

Parenting is easy!!
They just want to befriend onions and eat whole tubes of toothpaste while you try and pour yourself cold coffee! Haha! What's everyone always complaining about!? Such a gift! Hahahelpmehahaha

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

If you want your prayer life challenged, try praying while Baby Shark is playing

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

I love nonconventional compliments

"You're so efficient"

Heck yeah I am! Time management skills, baby!!!

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

My daughter's eyebrows are incredibly on fleek and absolutely held in place by snot.

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

@WearOSbyGoogle Oh sweetie that's already been done.

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

I have been up working since 5 and Google Fit says I have only been active for 5 minutes.

[Stephen Colbert @StephenAtHome]

HEY SIRI CANCEL MY PLANS THIS WEEKEND

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

The "1 more special thing" was Juniper's birthday xox

[halsey @halsey]

Damn I love y’all. And there’s only 6 songs out...including without me... I can’t wait til you hear the rest... also there’s 1 more special thing coming before the album is out! We are less than a week away! Surreal...

[SparkNotes @SparkNotes]

Ladies, if he's

- always giving you one-word responses
- unsupportive when you're visibly upset
- coming over unannounced in the middle of the night
- faintly tapping at your chamber door

He's not your man. He's the Raven, nothing more.

[Oliver Sachgau @sachgau]

the emmys need a category for TikToks right this instant

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

Really important that you guys vote on this, thnx

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

There are few things in life that I struggled to make it through, not the least of which being a diaper change in which my child to put both of her hands and one foot immediately into poop.

[elizabeth tobin @elizeebee]

@youngtrillvibez Everyone needs an aloe plant! I'm just fulfilling my civil duty! ♥️