Elliott Greene

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

How do you even win a game of twister?

[Bibawen @asimbawe]

How it feels returning to the bar after your friends sent you home in an Uber

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

@ajd22_UW I have honey and mint ones

[Matty D @mattdarnell0]

If one lense is a monocle why isn’t two lenses a bionicle

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

@lukesmith7418 The people need to know

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

@lukesmith7418

[Dominic Canzone Supremacist @McJeffington]

A good sneeze can set the tone for your day. Just had an absolute unit of a sneeze and I feel fuccin fantastic. All cleared up. Time to attacc the day 😈 #Sneeze #Attacc

[Anna Khachiyan @annakhachiyan]

Why did Hasbulla not get an invite to the Met Gala?

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

If you’re shmotzed it’s okay to pee sitting down

[Drew has no sources @Raiders2Mainey]

Dawg I’m crying 💀💀😭 not the Kum Bucket

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

#overthefence

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

If you use the excess zipper when you pee I’m out on you

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

If you don’t flush 5 seconds before finishing, do you hate the environment?

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

Dave east vs. David west

Tap in

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

“Which is my shlong, which is my leg”

-Abraham Lincoln
1858

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

@mattdarnell0 Koom

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

To those who think wearing boxers longer than your shorts, and revealing the integrity of your undergarments are okay, please STOP. You know who you are #dontnormalizethis

[Matty D @mattdarnell0]

He got me in the middle of class which was against the rules #stopthecap

[Matty D @mattdarnell0]

I don’t do the white rabbit but 4:42 of Free Bird by Lynyrd Skynyrd has me wanting to destroy gator tails that would impress Steve Irwin

[Elliott Greene @elliott750]

@shsassassin2k18 Ops only