ematasar

[Kelly Ohlert @KellyOhlert]

Grandma: I checked your book out from the library, but I wrinkled it a little bit before I returned it, so people would know it's popular.

I'm retiring from marketing. Grandma is taking over.

[chris evans @notcapnamerica]

Stephen Miller, 37 Hakeem Jeffries, 52

[Shaquise @shockisking]

I feel worn out. Like I just wanna have salt & vinegar chips and sour candy.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Did you know that ongoing exposure to NO2 from gas stoves is linked to reduced cognitive performance

[u m a m i @u_m_a_m_i]

Sony owns a patent that would force viewers to exclaim the brand name during commercials to end them.

[Harry Wood @harrymwood]

I used to be one of those east coasters who made fun of LA people for being scared of rain or temperatures below 60 degrees. But then I moved here and found out all of the houses are made of tissue paper and the roads are giant Flood Buckets so I get it now

[Mueller, She Wrote @MuellerSheWrote]

Right where he likes to be

[Read Jackson Rising @JPHilllllll]

At least 400 Bolsonaro supporters arrested already. The response to this has put the U.S. response to 1/6 to shame.

https://t.co/AORJTQaDwv

[Jordan Ramble @Jordanramble]

u gotta learn the difference between your intuition guiding u & your trauma misleading you.

[Jonathan Berk @berkie1]

This is the true story...of 435 strangers... picked to live in a house... and have their lives taped...to find out what happens... when people stop being polite...and start getting real...

[Lucero Cantu @luceroicantu]

C-SPAN needs to set up a confessional camera ASAP

[Keenan @keenanawillis]

So are my taxes gonna be prorated for this past week where I’ve had no federal representation???

[Jamie Raskin @jamie_raskin]

We never had to deal with this much chaos when George Santos was Speaker.

[Hannah @queen_meghan14]

One day we’re gonna talk about how after being responsible for the attacks that pushed Meghan to the brink of suicide Kate Middleton proceed to steal her entire persona

[Olivia Julianna 🇺🇸🦅🗳️ @0liviajulianna]

Living vicariously through @AOC right now

[Alexandra Petri @petridishes]

https://t.co/L8wn4SJpsD

[Sophia Benoit @1followernodad]

I can’t imagine having a little popularity contest at work and losing three times

[Rebecca Fachner @rebecca_fachner]

The last time a Speaker didn’t win in the first ballot was in 1923 and so we’re gonna go live to the 4 Congressmen and 6 Senators who were there for a reaction.