Mary PheLankford

blue cheese, I’m addicted to blue cheese

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@NFTAMetro Is there a sign for this somewhere or am I just supposed to know this?

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@NFTAMetro Is there any reason why your trains on Main St.are running in the wrong direction!? Today I’m driving down Main St. at Genesee &thankfully I found a parking spot quick enough because the train was driving in the right lane in the OPPOSITE DIRECTION!!!

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@NFTAMetro Tell me why the conductor looked at me like I was the one driving down the wrong side of the street when it was CLEARLY him!! Is he a former Tube driver? This isn’t London.

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@jimmyfallon The coworker that would clip his nails (toe or hand we are not sure) and then sent weird braggy emails about his Lexus to one of my work friends. And yes his email was something like “[email protected]”

Don’t work in a call center kids

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@jimmyfallon Where do I start?! Do you want the story about my coworker who sounded like Foghorn Leghorn and one time referred to Wednesday afternoon as the backend of Hump Day
OR!
(1/2)

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

You don’t quit your job, you quit your boss. #iamnotasnob #gfy

[🔥2️⃣Forever0️⃣🔥 @dmlfc11]

Anyone wanna tell @AlexiLalas he might wanna see the liver doctor?

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

So no state will have the right…coool…

[Planned Parenthood @PPFA]

BREAKING: Nearly 3 months after Roe v. Wade was overturned, Congressional Republicans introduced a national abortion ban.

It is clear that this is, and has always been, about controlling our bodies.

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@_manning09 Oh no!! We have flashlights

[Lori Trahan @RepLoriTrahan]

Price for a barrel of oil today: $117.59
Price for a barrel of oil in 2014: $120.45

So why are gas prices 2 dollars higher per gallon today than they were in 2014?

Because Big Oil corporations are hiking prices to rake in record-setting profits.

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@larrabeeskot @rainnwilson Haha thr Putin Poopin Collector…the head of thr PPC!

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@larrabeeskot @westofmain_ Champagne Bordeaux

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@jameelajamil I was away from my guys for 5 days…I can’t imagine being gone that long. It must be so hard on you, he’s such a cutie!

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE POEPLE@IN THR BACK!!

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

I’m in a training and the trainer is saying “right?” After every sentence and point he makes. #soannoying #idpreferums #rightrightright #wrong

[Brian Tyler Cohen @briantylercohen]

NEW: The Senate unanimously passes the Daylight Protection Act, making daylight saving time permanent. The bill now heads to the House.

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@OscarTheGrouch @larrabeeskot You and Oscar couldn’t relate more rn!

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

Word of the day: Neighbwhore

[Mary PheLankford @emmgee85]

@JeffBezos @amazon What the ACTUAL FUCK?!? #amazon #JeffBezos #whatisamazonselling #slavery #LGBTQ #WTF