Emily Blank

like my life, this twitter's in shambles.

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

@nap8244 The only authority I trust in chicago weather.

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

Hey Twitter. Just reinstating my existence with the fact that I'm YOUNGER than ANY of the Jonas Brothers. I'm fine. It's cool. Really.

[shan @heeleeys]

goodnight here’s @vampireweekend playing the parks and rec theme in the middle of M79

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

The new IDOT commercials are more brutal than last year's siren-radio spots and the "buckle up or fucking die" traffic boards combined. (but also drive safe, I've got friends out there my dudes)
⛔👷‍♂️🚧

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

We only rate dogs. Please don’t send in Bulbasaur. We’re not sure what to do with them. Thank you... 13/10

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

gooooob morning. i’m going to need a lot of attention today. i can just tell

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

I bought leggings with pockets on the sides and I don't know how I've survived this long without them. Pockets, y'all. POCKETS.

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

i’ve been thinking about it a lot. and i love you

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

I always say "thank you" to my google phone, cause she deserves to know she's doing a great job, too. (but also hopefully when the robots take over she'll put in a good word)

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

Hey twitter, been a minute. I'm just here to say I love Ian Happ. kthxbye.

[Ian Happ @ihapp_1]

I’m excited to finally share this project at #cubscon. This is for you @cubs fans. Look for more info in the coming days 👀

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

I take back ever negative thing I've ever said about audiobooks. My thoughts were tainted by a string of bad readers I guess. 📖🗣️

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

"Well, I went to West Virginia, and ya know what? Screw you. Here, in the heart of every belief system I've ever mocked or fought against, I was welcomed with open arms, I found a place both heartbreaking and beautiful."

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

Anthony Bourdain was such an important insight to the human condition and our collective cultures. Fuck, man. Just... Fuck, take care of your mental health and eat everything weird you can get yer hands on.

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

I could listen to Kathleen Zellner dissect terrible cases for hours. #MakingAMurderer

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

gooooob morning. you can do it. but if you need help. i’m just a noggin pat away

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

today was pumpkin carving day. and i was given. my very own little pumpkin. but i got too attached to it. and when it was time to carve. i didn’t let anyone near it. i saved it from the knife. and in the pumpkin realm. i am a hero

[Chance The Rapper @chancetherapper]

Remember when dealing with friends or family with mental illness, that your expectations and their progess will always be separate. Its easy to become frustrated when dealing with someone you’re so familiar with but its integral to their growth that you are patient & supportive

[NowThis Impact @nowthisimpact]

This brilliant parody song proves why it's anything but a 'scary time' for men

[Emily Blank @emzblank]

The more I write boring things professionally, the more I realize how much I want to write creatively... 📜📚📝

[Chance The Rapper @chancetherapper]

I never knew I could be so happy