Erin Shroyer

[Matt Bellassai @MattBellassai]

getting ready for another day of everyone’s shit

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

This evening, as a nation in mourning, we pay tribute to the lives we have lost.

[Erin Brockovich @ErinBrockovich]

The President has not been silenced. He has a press room right in his house. He’s more than welcome to step up to the podium, speak and even take some questions.

He is not a victim

[Dan Rather @DanRather]

The irony is that almost none of these rioters wore masks so they will be easier to identify.

[Jim Tews @jimtews]

You’re right. It was Aunt Tifa

[schmoyoho, accent on the yo @schmoyoho]

Animaniacs is the key to all of this

[Touré @Toure]

Groups that have attacked the Capital:

(1) The British in 1812.

(2) Trump supporters in 2021.

That’s it.

[Ben Rhodes @brhodes]

If you don't impeach and remove a President for staging a coup, what's the point of impeachment.

[Demi Burnett @demi_burnett]

Normalize peeing after sex in movies so women stop getting UTIs

[Erin Shroyer @enshroyer]

Same

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

To young girls and women everywhere: dream with ambition and know that there are no limits to what you can be.

[Matt Bellassai @MattBellassai]

if you listen closely, you can hear the sounds of honking, cheering, and melania furiously throwing suitcases into a uhaul

[Erin Shroyer @enshroyer]

Yes we did!!

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

We did it, @JoeBiden.

[Dave Itzkoff @ditzkoff]

Anderson Cooper, folks.

[Matt Bellassai @MattBellassai]

the erratic horny energy that sarah jessica parker brought to hocus pocus is what i’m bringing to halloween night on the couch

[Matt Bellassai @MattBellassai]

whenever i’m like “ugh i got nothing done today” i simply remember that i successfully did not attend a super spreader event at the white house and that counts as productivity

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

Good morning. 25 days to go. Let’s get this done, together→ https://t.co/MykJL0X5gt.

[John Fugelsang @JohnFugelsang]

THAT FLY IS HANGING ON LIKE BETTY WHITE Y'ALL

#VPDebate

[Dan Rather @DanRather]

I don’t think VP Pence’s mansplaining and over-talking is doing a lot to narrow the gender gap, unless it is also turning off more men as well.