Errantis

Enlightened Kenarchist, pseudo gym bro sigma lord, literally me. Cinema enjoyer, casual gamer, meme collector, shitposter, shenanigan enthusiast.

[Errantis @errantis_]

Fake cinephile follow me on Letterboxd or don’t I guess idgaf

https://t.co/rjHSgKz3WJ

[Errantis @errantis_]

@jackbuckby Some of the best cheddar cheese in the world is made in America and is sold in American groceries.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A breakfast counter. The waitress recommended the biscuits and gravy, and when the plate arrived, I thought something had gone wrong in the kitchen.

I say this with shame. The dish looked like a construction site after rain. Pale mounds. Gray ladle-fall. Speckles I could not identify.

In my land, the eye eats first. A meal is arranged like a garden. This meal was arranged like weather.

"Is it… finished?" I asked, carefully.

"Honey, that's what it looks like."

The man beside me was already eating his. He did not look up. "Just try it."

I am a man who has charged hillsides at dawn. I raised the fork. I tried it.

I must now formally apologize to the biscuits, the gravy, the waitress, the kitchen, and the entire breakfast tradition of the American South.

It was magnificent. Warm. Peppered. The biscuit drank the gravy the way a field drinks rain — THAT is why it is shaped like that, you fool — and every mound I had insulted was a soft fold of comfort that my homeland, in eight hundred years, never once thought to invent.

"Well?" the waitress asked.

"I judged it," I confessed. "By its appearance. I am ashamed."

"Everybody does, hon."

Everybody does. A national dish that forgives you for doubting it. It expects the doubt. It waits for you on the other side of it.

Do not judge the gravy by its face. Judge yourself, for hesitating.

I order it every Saturday now. I no longer see the construction site. I see only the garden.

It was a garden the whole time. The eye must be trained.

[Errantis @errantis_]

@WWFC_ST21 Oh so it’s drunk food. Why didn’t you say so? Americans totally understand that.

[Errantis @errantis_]

@CZXzbt @_HMSP The laziest American can still toast some bread and milk cheese on it

[Errantis @errantis_]

@Lmachain1 @_HMSP The planes are gone mate. You can season and heat your food safely now.

[Errantis @errantis_]

@dayglowj0e @_HMSP Who fucking cares if it keeps you are supposed to eat it hot not stick it in the pantry

[Errantis @errantis_]

@CZXzbt @_HMSP Why spend time doing that? Cause it tastes a lot better

[Errantis @errantis_]

@jackbuckby Can we all at least agree that like a half inch slab of onion on top of an equally thick piece of cold cheese is probably hard to take a bite of?

[Errantis @errantis_]

@MiamiNiiice @dyingscribe I think they fumbled the marketing before the movie came out. Like that one video they released after the movie came out of the “ what’s going on“ song. Why wasn’t that everywhere in the marketing before the movie came out? Huge miss.

[Errantis @errantis_]

@dyingscribe You liked it?

[Errantis @errantis_]

That’s complimentary food. It’s literally free. You don’t expect it to taste like it’s 5 star you expect it to taste like it’s free

[Groundhopper FC @groundhopper_fc]

As a European I really thought the American Breakfast would be a bit… “ better “ than this…

But at least the Waffle was amazing🤩🇺🇸

IT IS MATCHDAYYY🧡🤩
#worldcup

[Errantis @errantis_]

@HighlordRetard @_HMSP Cooking the onions and melting the cheese does not add sugar lmao

[Errantis @errantis_]

@_HMSP “Americans can’t understand this” and its shit Americans wouldn’t feed a dog

[Henry @_HMSP]

Did it never occur to y’all to caramelize the onions, toast the bread, and melt the cheese?

[Errantis @errantis_]

@justalexoki Missionary is the most intimate sexual position. Maximum body contact. Full skin on skin. If you don’t like the best position to look your partner in the eye during the moment of passion then… hang on I’ve got a boner at the gym

[Errantis @errantis_]

The American mind will let you keep whatever this is, we are good thanks

[Largacty3 𓅃 @largacty3]

The American mind cannot comprehend the pub cheese and onion roll

[Wakandantechsupport @SkylerB97]

How bad is the food in the UK to where Golden Corral is a revelation?

[Errantis @errantis_]

@Red_6250 Yeah I need to raid today

[Errantis @errantis_]

My toxic trait is that I would immediately walk away from a person like this and ignore them if I ever saw them again

[𝒮𝒶𝓈𝒽𝒶 @Sasha_Screens]

i'm talking with someone at this wedding and i said i've never seen deadpool vs wolverine and he said 'you must not be a big movie person'