sheems

📍MPLS | she/her | 🌈

[sheems @esheems]

i swear that one day 7 years ago my lips got chapped and i haven’t been able to recover since

[sheems @esheems]

God gives me the strength to run through concrete when I hear someone call my best friend their best friend

[sheems @esheems]

being the new kid at work and not getting invited to something rly makes me wanna kms (read: quit, hate everyone, never come back)😕

[sheems @esheems]

god blessed me with the most expensive taste, but forgot the budget

[sheems @esheems]

looking to sell my soul to a different corporation, TIA 💕

[sheems @esheems]

boomer minnesotan coworkers are so goddamn passive aggressive

[sheems @esheems]

when you get called intelligent at work

[sheems @esheems]

i forget that men can find me stunningly beautiful because i think they’re gross #gay

[sheems @esheems]

“i love calculus” - meg

[sheems @esheems]

re-entering my cowboy era

[sheems @esheems]

@slotkokusminov i’m kms’ing they’re that bad

[sheems @esheems]

are you the type of friend that will always help friends move when they ask or do you kind of suck

[sheems @esheems]

you should be jailed for popping your gum in a silent office

[sheems @esheems]

p sure you shouldn’t be listening to your podcast without headphones in the office 🤔

[sheems @esheems]

not working from home, but thanks for paying me to hang out

[sheems @esheems]

god bless the girly at trader joe’s who asked me if i was driving to iceland

[sheems @esheems]

backwards hat at jesus summer camp me should’ve been gay a lot sooner

[sheems @esheems]

also tbt to my sister giving me covid on my birthday last year #blessed

[sheems @esheems]

reminded my mom she could get me something gold (like, good gold) for my birthday cause turning 31 on the 31st is anticlimactic, not golden 😐

[sheems @esheems]

oh, you’re obsessed with me? i know

[sheems @esheems]

@tashpoint_0h wait this is inSAN