Sam Parker Bowles

still trying to create the perfect playlist

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

Impressed that the thieves were so easily able to find what they were looking for in The Louvre

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

NYT connections

- Bruce Springsteen’s top four favourite pasta dishes
- Different ways the Irish say “drunk”
- Words that were added to the Oxford dictionary in 1957
- The last three letters of US states that each have five theme parks

- Dog breeds

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

For crying out loud @waitrose, he was only born a few days ago.

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

Seasons greetings and joy to all.

Except the person who decided to put the static light option on Christmas lights as the seventh press

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

@WayfairUK please can you respond to my emails about my order - it has been months now and no update or delivery

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

You see signs like “Deliveries for flat 4B. If no answer pls go round corner to the Boots and ask for Steve. He’ll sign for package. If Steve is on break, please call the number below and Jane will meet you at the Tesco next door. But not on Mondays”

Yup, good luck with that.

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

I’m a fire starter….

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

I’m really going to miss turning the TV on any point in the day, saying “they really shouldn’t have this ridiculous sport in the Olympics”, getting fully invested in the battle for the bronze medal a few hours later and then sobbing at the medal ceremony #Olympics

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

@MenuhinSchool A wonderful and brilliant woman. Will be deeply missed x

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

You’ve been hit by, you’ve been struck by a…

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

You had better tidy your bedroom or, so help me God, I will mutter in a passively aggressive way and do it myself

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

Happy Harry Potter costume day #WorldBookDay

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

@eBay_UK @eBay I need to email you (rather than chat to a bot) about a number of issues. What is your email address please?

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

The problem with having a birthday as a man is that you don’t want anything but you do want something

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

Who’d have thought that a country singer could be the saviour of cinema?

@taylorswift13

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

What I say at the hotel breakfast buffet

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

@official_enya

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

Things I think about more than The Roman Empire:

- how Marty and Doc became friends in the first place
- why so many sausage dishes have animal names (toad in hole, pigs in blankets, hot dog…)
- the movie Parasite
- FPL
- why Pilates isn’t pronounced the same way as pirates

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

How high was the king to instruct his horses to try to put Humpty Dumpty together?

[Sam Parker Bowles @espeybee]

There is a certain cruelty that I am often prevented from doing the thing I hope to do by the people who exist because I did that thing I wanted to do a few years ago