Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers

Dude/Bro

[CBS Sacramento @CBSSacramento]

For years, California leaders accused oil companies of price gouging at the pump, but a state investigation found no evidence of that. Instead, a CBS News California investigation found what's really driving the highest gas prices in the U.S. https://t.co/NTCE6Dx6kl

[CableThanos @JoshCashman_]

The Seahawks Are The #1 Seed

[Bill Ackman @BillAckman]

This could be the most pathetic reporting I have seen. The reporter calls the daycare centers to ask them if they are legitimate. I kid you not. How is this supposed to determine whether fraud is taking place? Are they expecting the centers to say ‘Yes. We are committing fraud.’

Six of seven don’t even answer the phone.

The media has and continues to fail us.

[Grant Slatton @GrantSlatton]

back during the Occupy Wall Street protests, one of the more affluent fraternities at my university hung up a banner identifying as "the 1%"

totally tasteless but objectively hilarious in retrospect

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

The surgeon general is not a real general. I would not trust a word he has to say about beer.

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

Does Trump play beer die?

[jimmy toots @futtywap]

Me on my first day of coin toss school https://t.co/rJKFuKy4wL

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

In football if your teammate makes a good play you have to smack them hard in the head multiple times. In baseball if your teammate makes a good play you have to smack them in the ass

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

I hope Chauncey Billups goes to jail for 30+ years

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

Trying to figure out how to become a cowboy, rodeo champion, President, movie star, NFL player, astronaut, wall street exec, and also maybe a famous musician all in one lifetime. Not necessarily in that order. Anyone have any experience with this?

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

@CAgovernor can you legalize the sale of Rainier beer in California? My friend Hammer who is the number one lawyer in california has a birthday coming up and it would mean the world to him if he is able to drink a rainier beer

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

Too much reefer smoking going on in the neighborhood #stopsmokingreefer

[Alex Kehr @alexkehr]

hot take: central park should be paved over and turned into an airport

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

Seen some of the worst roughing the passer calls I've ever seen this week @NFL what the heck is going on

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

I like how costco gives out free samples but I think they should start giving out free samples of beer. Specifically 16oz samples that are poured cold and on draft

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

I am going on the record to certify Cam Skattebo and Jaxson Dart as "swaggy white boys"

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

I like how President Trump refers to ozempic as the "fat pill"

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

@speblack Clean up your room

[Bobo Mixes @bobomixes]

Jake Bobo is your 2025 #NFLTOP100 #1 ranked player 🙌🔥 #Seahawks

[Dave “Softy” Mahler @Softykjr]

Let's be honest:

Seahawks made a mistake with these uniforms and they should never be worn.

Mistakes happen. Seahawks franchise doesn't make a lot of them but this was one.

Pull them.

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

California is a state that is allegedly a leader in clean energy. There are windmills and solar farms everywhere.

[Ethan "Can't guard me" Mayers @ethan_mayers]

The biggest assholes (for the lack of a more offensive term) on the planet work for @SCE. Record profits (up 10% last year) while "customer" rates have increased 26% over the last 3 years. The cherry on top is that they also cause wildfires!