Evan

[Evan @evanvr821]

At any given time over the past 15+ years, no matter what was going on in your life, you could watch this guy play soccer and for 90 min forget about everything else. Thank you for the joy and entertainment you have given us all

[Evan @evanvr821]

Why are europoors seething at this post

[Evan @evanvr821]

3pm semis on a Tuesday and a Wednesday honestly fuck you Gianni Infantino

[Evan @evanvr821]

@hydr0g0d Yes you dumbfuck there’s definitely champions league games in Dallas, Texas

[Evan @evanvr821]

@stanleymwc Eat several franks you fucking dweeb

[Evan @evanvr821]

@ThehZod Happy for you bro cherish it while it lasts

[Evan @evanvr821]

@sc0ttstr33t Dude it’s a fucking disgrazia

[Evan @evanvr821]

That’s dior ohm not dior homie

[Evan @evanvr821]

@Idris7_ It’s brutal bro, can barely watch any of them in full anymore🕊️

[Evan @evanvr821]

I’m actually so baffled by this Messi campaign. 8 goals and counting and almost every single one has been a banger. I wasn’t even sure he’d play bro

[Evan @evanvr821]

@rentfreeiyh Basically psychological torture

[Evan @evanvr821]

Usually pretty pessimistic about these things but I honestly think he’s about to go crazy. We’ve literally never seen Messi play at a World Cup without a metaphorical gun to his head before

[Evan @evanvr821]

It’s like, sunshine on a rainy day it’s like a high could you take me awayyy

[Evan @evanvr821]

Knew we were absolutely FUCKED as soon as I saw clips from that T**** press conference

[Evan @evanvr821]

Bowing out in a respectable manner to Colombia or England is whatever but that would’ve been an actual calamity

[Evan @evanvr821]

Dog could sense how stressed I was watching Argentina Verde and kept jumping up on the couch and putting his paw on my arm

[Evan @evanvr821]

@rentfreeiyh Turn ur dms on so we can add you

[Evan @evanvr821]

Like this is why people are fat.

[Evan @evanvr821]

Why is it so hard to find a crisp green apple these days. The “fresh” produce in this country is fucking dogpiss

[Evan @evanvr821]

And the tomato situation is even bleaker. Can’t even find a good one at farmers markets