eva maybe

boinked up in the zoinky

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

The reason Bob Dylan has a no phone policy at his concerts is because he brings out Prince for the final song #noNDA

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

thinking about becoming a sovereign citizen just for the bit

[Ali @haramcart]

Haven’t heard about Ethan Klein in a while. Appreciate the small things

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

Saw a woman getting fingerbanged in the used crockpot aisle at savers yesterday. You cannot tell me romance is dead

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

Having a dog is just owning a sentient fart cloud that roams around

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

Got my nieces and nephew recorders and a pound of lucky charm marshmallows for Christmas.
Favorite aunt: yes✅
Favorite person to the parents of those children: absolutely not✅

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

At this point I’m convinced gift wrapping is a genetically inherited skill that skipped me completely

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

Coldplay really cooked with viva la vida

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

I have whatever mental illness it is that causes extreme sadness whenever you finish a movie series

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

#NewProfilePic

[grimace @siIIymonkey]

my sick toddler:

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

I think we need to start expanding our horizons on animals we deem acceptable to eat. Getting real sick of the rotation we have going on rn

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

Saw a picture of Epstein today and realized I’ve been confused about who he is this whole time. Genuinely have been picturing him as this guy

[Tim Walz @Tim_Walz]

An open forum for political dialogue and disagreement was upended by a horrific act of targeted violence. In America, we don’t settle our differences with violence or at gunpoint. I’m praying for Charlie, his family, and his young children.

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

I used to be cool but now I’m just at home trying to keep a kid alive and googling stuff like this

[𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖊 🕯 @atlanticesque]

I often got called “an old soul” and such like by adults when I was a child. I think this was a kind way of saying I was a sad little freak

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

Nothing worse in this world than admitting a man was right😩

[elliott @elliott_green_]

I’m like a nepo baby but for mental illness and alcoholism

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

The truest sign of knowing you’ve made it as a musician is having a kidzbop cover of your song

[eva maybe @evasrantings]

The day before your child’s first birthday is such a mess of emotions