The reason I'll never be in a romantic relationship is that if I hate myself so much then my mind tells me that everyone else feels the same way and even trying is a waste of time. Thus I can't ever be direct in my expectations and I float around it till all spark dies.
Me un aliveing myself will be proceeded by many social media posts of memes and subtle clues. So until then, get off my fucking back and let me self critique and bottle up every manic thought I have like a goddam adult.
Men don't lift the spirits of other men like women do for each other. And unless a women wants to sleep with a guy they don't bother lifting up men's spirits either. So S.O.L I seem to be.