The most manipulative but effective thing I’ve ever done in my life was when I read an article about how children moderate their behavior to protect their self-identity, so if a child believes he’s smart, for example, he’ll intentionally study and try to do well to protect his image of himself.
Anyway, I would pull kids aside with behavioral issues at church and tell them, “David (obviously fake name), you’re such a kind person and such a good listener. I can see that in you. Thank you for always listening.” “Little Annie, thank you for taking such good care of the babies around you. You’re going to be such a good big sister. Can you be in charge of watching Sally?”
They would ALWAYS behave afterward. ALWAYS. Worked like a charm. Morally questionable because it wasn’t initially true, but I kind of willed it into existence. Tbf, I did think that they had that in them or I wouldn’t have tried.
Will publish longitudinal results of this method once my kid is old enough to report back.
First she decides what haircut and facial hair best suits him, then she changes his clothes, then she tackles small details- watch, wallet, jewelry, shoes etc. Then she buys you some shit like niacinamide serum
Hate to use a child as an example but it really is never about the money. You can grow up in the most privileged of situations—massive house, private jets, access to anything you want—and if the family system you grow up within isn’t stable, it’ll likely show in the external. The alt community has always been a haven for troubled teenagers, a physical expression of internal struggle. It’s attractive because it’s other; it emphasizes the otherness these teens feel internally. Alt music and fashion are aligned in this. Unfortunately, unless you grew up with both financial stability and familial/emotional instability it’s unlikely you’re gonna get this. That’s okay. Maybe the next life. But for those that think their struggle can be dismissed by their financial privilege just know that’s not true, and you don’t need to feel guilty or ungrateful anymore.
Women have a deeply ingrained, almost biological radar for subtle aggression that men are entirely blind to. We size each other up in milliseconds. We know exactly what a specific tone means, we notice the micro-expressions, and we know exactly when another woman's "compliment" is actually an insult. Men think women are just being "catty" or paranoid, but it’s actually a highly evolved threat assessment. We can spot a woman with bad intentions from across the room, even while she is smiling.
the fact people have no empathy for you when they think you have it all is so sick…and even if you show a lil vulnerability they will become happy that you in fact don’t “have it all” like they assumed you did
I think one of the worst things the patriarchy did was make every trait associated with being a good person feminine, and then demonized men for being good because because it was feminine. Idk if this makes sense I'm tired