matt brown

[matt brown @faggo]

All y’all confused about offsides in soccer are telling me you also don’t watch hockey so maybe sit the hot sports takes out. (It’s the same rule.) (sitting something out is also a sports reference.)

[matt brown @faggo]

Well well

[Darth Powell @VladTheInflator]

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYY FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

[matt brown @faggo]

.

[meredith @noyeahobviously]

“Testing positive for pregnancy” is an in interesting way to say “being raped and impregnated by ICE agents”

[Karl Welzein @DadBoner]

Just when you think there’s nothing good in the world, Megadeth puts out a new album that takes you back to when American babes were ripe, a roadie in the cup holder was nbd, and you could smoke a Winston in the middle of the mall. Sad some nerds had to ruin everything, you guys.

[matt brown @faggo]

@RealJamesWoods Said the guy who thought “the hard way” was a good idea. Cool.

[matt brown @faggo]

Huh. Ya don’t say..

[Republicans against Trump @RpsAgainstTrump]

Trump: “Smart people don’t like me”

Fact check: 100% true.

[matt brown @faggo]

@LauraHayesDC Weirdly enough, the physical bar at bar Pilar came from the buffalo billiards in DuPont, which had come from the Hinkley Hilton before that.

[George Conway ⚖️🇺🇸 @gtconway3d]

This is a very Nazi thing to say, actually.

[matt brown @faggo]

I’d eat there!

[Stephen King @StephenKing]

How about this logo?

[John Connor @John_Connor42]

@AesPolitics1 Sorted!

[Donald Trump’s Neck Vagina @torontobaddy]

Who was this reporter? I’d like to buy them a drink. 🥃

[matt brown @faggo]

Hey @DionsPizza thanks for the sweet cardboard “plate” for my dine in order.

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

now this is cinema

[matt brown @faggo]

@unclekateyy It’s gonna be 95 next week. Don’t let ‘em fool ya

[matt brown @faggo]

In a news conference, desantis just referred to it more than once as the “eyeball of the hurricane.” Oh, little buddy…

[matt brown @faggo]

@benmahlerdc Swing for the parental stars!

[matt brown @faggo]

@littlelizzel Could it be any more obvious?

[matt brown @faggo]

Man, @elonmusk , gone too soon. Rest in Power, king.

[matt brown @faggo]

@sleepymurph Those dance parties. Six straight hours of the cure 🦼

[matt brown @faggo]

The Cure is not a good band. The fact they’re not fucktwats like morrissey is not an excuse. #hotTake