Fail-Druid

Clawing my way from the depths of fail; the eternal strive for mediocrity continues...

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@Justin4daweeknd @neiltyson @bumble_app So... instead of excitedly sending her links, broadening her worldview (and indirectly giving her something to talk to you about), you are tweeting someone you are a fan of to ask if you should pursue that person.

I think we've stumbled upon why you're single.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@AndrewGhai It makes me happy that at any given second, an infinite number of Andrew Ghais are tackling an infinite number of JSRs. #Multiverse

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@mikeycamp95 @TheRochaSays @AndrewGhai @MigoTheGamer @KristianHarloff Not that there's anything wrong with knowing trivia. I'm just saying that when picking my dystopian hellscape squad, I will take a form-perfect shoulder tackle over knowing who won Best Supporting Actress in 1979.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@mikeycamp95 @TheRochaSays @AndrewGhai @MigoTheGamer @KristianHarloff The way our future is looking, in 5 years, Ghai may have already had to kill and eat Rocha. I like to think his last words will be "But trivia..."

[Evan Gregory @getsomeevan]

Happy Foxing Day!

(The day your in-laws switch from A Christmas Story back to Fox News)

[Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson]

If you accumulate all the flora, fauna, and metal your true love gives you each day in the “Twelve Days of Christmas” song, you’ll own 12 Trees, 40 Gold Rings, 140 Humans, and 185 Birds of 6 different species.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@AndrewGhai That's mine as well. Have you checked your shitter lately?

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@AndrewGhai @KalTheSchmoeDog I got it too. #BearsCanSpeakDog

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

You know, now that they have won the War on Christmas that they manufactured, I'm really curious what they're going to whine about next Christmas.

I mean, outside of the midterm election results. https://t.co/YQTySOWtCt

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

People are proud to be saying Merry Christmas again. I am proud to have led the charge against the assault of our cherished and beautiful phrase. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@WhiteRa66it824 @orangeboop4455 @neiltyson I mean, to be fair, you can still call Pluto a planet. You can call a car a tree if you want to. All of language is arbitrary; just sounds we as a culture decided had certain meanings. I just would not expect the scientific community in general to agree with you.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@Valerian_Blood @deepwatermike Joke's on you. We're leaving you a totally fucked planet. Enjoy the future, sweetheart.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@ZoltanCOMEDY Where's the joke though? :/

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@orangeboop4455 @neiltyson "...based on the prior *incorrect* definition..."

There. Fixed that for you.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@orangeboop4455 @neiltyson ... no. It was not. This is why its categorization was corrected.

If you would like it to be a planet, please change Pluto so that it shares more characteristics with planets, and less with other space debris on the outer rim of our solar system.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@orangeboop4455 @neiltyson Pluto was never a planet. It was just incorrectly categorized originally. You cannot make something 'again' that never was to begin with.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@neiltyson Whoa, whoa, whoa there, Dr. Tyson. Just because I don't believe in fairy tales doesn't mean I'm not still cashing in on American society decreeing I get presents. :p

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@chrisdelia I love the "Also?" way more than I should.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@Lesdoggg This is statistically and categorically true. #NotAllMenButComeOnLookAtTheNewsFor2SecondsItsMostOfThem

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@mktoon @reysbens @AndrewGhai @TheRochaSays @KristianHarloff Phrasing.

[Fail-Druid @faildruid]

@AndrewGhai The "Touch of Class"