@ the gym, there were 2girls taking selfies in the mirror. Both rockin’ short shorts w/matching over-sized Nirvana shirts. I excitedly asked if they were going to their show in Vancouver next month, without skipping a beat, they both told me they were!
I told them to have fun!
Ok. Hear me out… 🧐
It’s not like I mind doing it… I actually find it extremely satisfying to do! O.o How the hell, in this day and age, do we not have an auto-lint remover in clothing dryer’s? - Or really, any use for a lint trap in them at all? 💭
Like seriously 🤔 #lint
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Slide into them DMs:
If it’s not men asking to eat my ass or begging me to wrap my legs around them and crush them... it’s people asking me about my diet and work out plan. 😆🤷♀️
It’s annoying as all hell when people watch tv/movies without headphones in public... HOWEVER,
it’s A WHOLE NEW feel when someone is watching softcore porn in public... with no headphones.
Wow.... WOW. 😳
#OkayByeeeeee
I wish people would, at the very least, vacuum before making home made *cough* erotica. Like really, I can’t even focus of the goodie bits cuz all I can see is junk all over the carpets. (Don’t get me started on nasty stains!) #YoYouNasty#DoesTheCarpetMatchTheDrapes#ICantEven
*Fally walks around the airport for hours*
*Fally realizes just before boarding her flight that there is a crusty brown substance smeared all over the right side of her ass*
😑
(It was chocolate. But yeah... FML, for serious)
One thing the older generation just can’t wrap their head around: Holes in jeans. Wearing jeans with holes in them. Buying jeans with holes in them. Paying a lot of money for jeans with holes in them. #jeans
🔥 🔥 🔥
A new form of hell:
When your headphones die during your workout and you have to listen to all the dudes in the gym flirt with each other and talk about their gainz.
#doyoueven#bro#fml#laugh#gainzhell
Need a surefire way to lose weight over the holidays?
1. Get braces.
2. Get them adjusted.
You can’t even breath, let alone eat because your whole fucking mouth and teeth and gums hurts.
You’re welcome.
#WeightLossTips
When the new-to-site and everything apprentice follows you everywhere... even almost into the woman’s washroom. It was hard not to giggle a little.
Poor lost little (big) guy.
He’s 6’9”! Haha! #millwright#site#ymm