meek

[ariana @esnifolibros]

yo pensando cómo estará haaland luego de la pérdida y cuando lo enfocan está con bellingham así

[SpideyDoesStuff @SpideyDoeStuff]

Mamdani at night

[Heidi (comms closed) @heytherenrds]

type of shit Charlie Chaplin would do

[Kae ‎‎‎ @Jolly_Blaziken]

The lebanese restaurant owner stopped giving me extra meat since he found out I wasn't Lebanese...

[ADIN @ADINresearch]

Had a Jane Street interview in 2014

Round 7. Interviewer says 'meet me at Washington Square Park, southwest corner, 2 PM.'

I show up. He's playing chess with a guy who's clearly hustling tourists. Interviewer's losing badly.

Without looking up he says, 'Take my position.'

I sit down. The chess hustler looks at me and grins. 'Your boy owes me $40. You covering his position?'

I look at the interviewer. He nods.

'Assume the debt,' he says. 'Now optimize.'

I study the board. I'm down a queen and two rooks. Completely hopeless.

'This position is unwinnable,' I say.

'Correct. Now make it profitable.'

'What?'

The chess hustler is getting impatient. 'You playing or what, kid?'

The interviewer slides me a $20. 'Market make this game.'

I'm confused. 'How do I market make chess?'

'Bid-ask on the number of moves until checkmate. Hustler takes the under, you take the over. Spread is your edge.'

I look at the position again. Maybe 8 moves max until I'm mated.

'I bid 12 moves, offer 15,' I announce.

The hustler laughs. 'I'll take the under on 12 all day.'

'Done,' says the interviewer. 'You're now short volatility on a deterministic outcome.'

Three moves later I'm checkmated. I owe the hustler $40 plus my $20 bet.

'How confident were you in that 12-move bid?' the interviewer asks.

'0.95,' I say, because that's what you always say.

'0.95 huh?' He chuckles. 'You just sold insurance on the Titanic.'

He stands up. 'The real trade was shorting your confidence and going long on the hustler's experience. You missed the obvious hedge: offering chess lessons to tourists at $25/hour while the game played out.'

'But I don't know how to play chess well enough to teach.'

'Exactly. That's called selling vol you don't have. Very Jane Street.'

Offer rescinded. Reason: 'Failed to recognize that the park itself was the market and the pigeons were the only rational actors.'"

[Sarah Deech ☕️ @londonette]

Me flicking through the menu at an Indian restaurant pretending to be open minded when I know full well I’m going to order the chicken tikka masala

[rokhannacycle @rokhannacycle]

someone said it's like seeing Spiderman swing by lmaoo

[Mihir @__mihir]

Notice they fw him now after he got clout

[duck @ExtremeBlitz__]

Bill Clinton calling for the full release of the Epstein Files:

[AT @primediscussion]

Came in to see wtf was going on for himself.

[Matthew Zeitlin @MattZeitlin]

Anyone who plays wordle where you don’t keep all the correct letters in the subsequent guess is a coward and a fraud

[Cree @HakarisupremaC]

We owe all the script writers for The Boys an apology

[prenkuarts @prenkuart]

basque baked cheesecake. 80 gms of pure bliss

[Niggaless Cage @afriasian]

Jokingly asked someone who lost a lot of weight if they used the gym or ozempic and they said cancer

[khaled @eltokh7]

no way he's copying the look

[M1das @M1das_OW2]

the shit zohran did to trump in their meeting

[☠️ Lilith Lovett ☠️ same @ on 💙☁️🦋 @LilithLovett]

Epstein documents gonna look like this when they “release the files”:

[ettingermentum @ettingermentum]

“Big Beautiful Bill”…

[soli @solisolsoli]

Dear Moon