๐ 9.39PM
Hello Villains, This is Gun-il
I think this will probably be my last greeting to you as a member of Xdinary Heroes.
I really wanted to remain Xdinary Heroes until the very end, and I wanted to protect the six-member Xdinary Heroes. But as you all know, I had no choice but to accept the companyโs decision
Even now, it still doesnโt feel real to me.
There are so many things I want to say to Villains. I still donโt know where or how to begin. But now that I am no longer a member of Xdinary Heroes, I donโt want to hide the truth or make excuses with lies just to protect myself. I believe there are things that I need to tell you myself, which is why I am writing this.
First of all, the person who wrote the post that started all of this was someone I met through an acquaintance and we dated for about two weeks.
At the time, I was mentally very exhausted because of the malicious comments and false rumors about me that had been going on for some time, as well as the various concerns I had about XDIZโs music and performances. Rather than burdening the people close to me by opening up about how I was feeling, I was at a point where it felt easier to vent my frustrations to a stranger who didnโt really know me.
The person who made the inappropriate remarks about fans in the phone recording that was made public to Villains was indeed me. Regardless of the reason, the fact that I said those things does not change. I sincerely apologize to everyone who was disappointed and hurt by what I said.
However, I want to honestly explain what kind of situation and emotional state I was in at the time and who those words were directed toward.
Earlier this year, sasaeng fans broke into our dorm, and they even put a tracking device on my personal vehicle and followed me around. After experiencing things like that, I developed a lot of fear and resentment toward certain malicious fans, and I went through a very difficult time emotionally.
But because I was the leader and also the oldest hyung, I couldnโt easily talk about my fears or anxiety. I tried my best to control my emotions and carry on.
Then, in June of this year, I prepared for the Inspire Arena concert with the members, wanting to give Villains the absolute best performance we could. We prepared incredibly hard, and after finishing the first dayโs performance, I checked social media with excitement and anticipation.
Of course, no performance can ever be perfect, and I believe we need to acknowledge our shortcomings and continue improving. However, that day, I saw a lot of malicious posts that went beyond criticism or opinions about the performance, things that were difficult for us to understand.
Because it was a performance I had prepared with all my heart, I think I broke down emotionally a lot when I saw the unexpected criticism and malicious comments.
That said, I didnโt want to cause worry to the company people or the members, so I couldnโt easily open up about my feelings. In the end, I poured out the emotions I had been holding back to someone I had only met not long ago, and in the process, I blurted out expressions that were too strong and wrong without hesitation.
I never thought that conversation would be recorded and made public. However, regardless of whether it was made public, I am fully aware that the very fact that I said such a thing was wrong.
There is only one thing I absolutely want to say.
At the time, the people I was speaking about emotionally were some malicious fans who, hiding behind anonymity, recklessly blamed us and violated our privacy. It was never what I said to all the villains who believed in and supported us.
I believe that because I have tried to show you the image of a diligent and reliable leader, the disappointment and sense of betrayal you may have felt through this matter must have been even greater. I sincerely feel very sorry about that.
๐ 9.39PM
Although I wasnโt able to give you a beautiful ending, thanks to Villains, I am leaving with so many happy moments in my life that I will never be able to forget.
Although I am now leaving Xdinary Heroes, I will never forget the love and affection you gave to me as Gun-il.
And wherever I may be in the future, I will always cheer for your lives as well.
Please continue to give our XDIZ lots and lots of love and support.
The five members are all wonderful, amazing, and lovable younger brothers to me, without exception.
Although I wonโt be able to fulfill the dream of performing at Wembley together with them, I will now stand one step behind them, cheering them on and supporting them so that they can someday achieve that dream.
I poured everything I had into Xdinary Heroes and Villains. I really loved it all, and I loved you all so much.
Thank you for sharing my youth with me.
This was Goo Gun-il. Thank you.
intinyadeh, last statement from Gunil on bbl:
- keluarnya gunil itu keputusan company, as he stated that "he had no choice but to accept the company's decision".
- gunil gak deny semua tuduhan yg di up di thread itu (so berarti spill-an di threadnya valid dan yg ngspill emg kerabatnya si gunil, entah bnran exnya atau siapa lah).
- pernah ada ssg bgst yg nerobos masuk dorm anak-anak xh, bahkan tu ssg sampe masang gps tracker ke mobil pribadinya gunil (anjing bgt dah). karena masalah itu gunil jd kepikiran bgt smpe anxiety, tp karena dia leader dia gamau ngebebanin org2 sekitarnya makanya dia pendem tuh emosinya sendiri :(( pd saat itu jg dia lg hectic sm persiapan summer concert, makanya dia berusaha latihan semaksimal mungkin (disaat dia lg ovt ovtnya) dan ngarepin outcome yg bagus dari para fans. tp ternyata penilaian fans jauh dr ekspektasinya makanya emosinya dia langsung meledak tuh setelah konser day 1.
- tp dia ttp berusaha nahan utk gak luapin itu ke rekan kerjanya (the staff & members). dia malah curhat ke org terdekatnya yg dianya ngerasa aman utk venting emotionnya (mungkin bener ini dia lg misuh2 ke pcrnya pada saat itu, tp eek jg pcrnya malah di leaked). dia minta maaf bgt udh pernah ngomong kasar begitu, tp sbnrnya dia tuh misuh2 gak generalized ditunjukkin utk semua villains ya. dia cuma sebel sm "yg katanya fans" tp jadiin mereka punching bag perkara gak puas sm summer concert kmrn. but still, he felt really sorry karena biar gimanapun jg perlakuannya yg ngatain pake bhs kasar itu sangat amat tidak dibenarkan. (c)